Kids
are naturally funny.
Some
of them take things so literally – others are goofballs that turn just about anything
into a joke. Some of them use physical humor (without really meaning to) and
some of them just have a gift.
I’m
not sure which category any of mine fall into, but I do know that they crack me
up on a regular basis with their shenanigans, weird words and “jokes.” They’re
at ages when they know what’s funny to them, but they aren’t quite so sure what
might be funny to anyone else.
For
example, knock-knock jokes are very popular around here these days, but some VERY
strange things show up at the proverbial door when I say, “Who’s there?” Things
like “Lamp Hat, Indian Beard, Monkey Boy” or “Window Rat.” Funny, yes… but
probably not in the witty way that they were intended!
Here
are some of my other recent favorite funnies:
When
my cousin Angela put her contacts in and some lipstick on, Josie looked at her
and said, “Huh. You’re looking pretty. I hadn’t noticed.”
Jed’s
very first knock-knock joke:
“Knot
knot.”
Me: “Who’s
there?”
“Cack.”
Me: “Cack
who?”
“Grandma!
Hahahaha!”
Sadie to
Josie: "If you were the last person on earth, and you had the last baby on
earth, and you were that baby's mom, what would you name it?"
Josie,
without skipping a beat: “Lucky."
Adelaide
was in a newspaper article about the library’s Lego Club. When Grandma Beth
found out about it, she exclaimed, “Adelaide, how did you make the paper?”
Adelaide replied with a sigh: “Grandma, I didn't make paper, I made
LEGOS."
2-year-old
Jed stomped through the house yelling: "Boobies!" I asked, laughing, “Oh,
do you like boobies?” He responded with a sneaky laugh: "Heh heh - yeah!
Yeah, I do.”
Adelaide:
"My true love is Prince Caspian. Actually it's Aragorn. No wait. Actually,
it's Legless." (Legless = Legolas from The Lord of the Rings)
Jed's
second shot at a knock-knock joke:
"Knot knot."
Me: “Who's there?”
"Wiener
sausage!"
Sadie
and Josie had a bit of an altercation over a favorite book. Sadie said, “I had
it first!" Josie shot back, "HEY! Didn't you learn anything in Sunday
School? The last shall be first!"
Sadie,
singing to her (pestering) little brother: "This old man, he said
NO!"
Me to Jed: "Jed, do
you know what color this balloon is?”
Jed:
“Yeah… it’s poop.”
My
children aren’t allowed to "swear" at our house. I recently overheard
how they have gotten around that rule: "I vow! I vow! I vow my little butt
off!"
Jed's
third try: "Knot knot." Who's there? "Cow." Cow who?
"Um... buncha cows. Moo to you!"
Not
to be outdone, Adelaide gave it a try:
"Knock knock!"
Me: “Who's there?”
"Banana."
Me: “Banana Who?”
"BananaBananaBananaBananaBananaBananaBananaBanana.
Say, aren't you glad I didn't say banana?"
Josie: "Adelaide! You
JUST DID.”
As
we backed out of a parking space at the mall, I asked, "Adelaide, is there
anyone behind me?" Jed piped up from the backseat: "Me! Me! I behind
you, Mommy!"
No matter the joke, my
kids always find a way to build up my self-esteem…like when this happened:
Me: “Adelaide, I found a
gray hair!”
Adelaide: “Don't worry.
I'll still love you when you're old. I'll also still love you when you're DEAD.
But that won't be for a while, right? Wait a second... How old are you again?”
from my 7/13/13 post for www.mentorpatch.com
