Sunday, January 29, 2006

Happy to you!

Sadie is now in the habit of making "cakes" out of blocks, or anything else she can find, and putting make believe candles on them. Then she carries them, very carefully, up to me or Jesse or Deanna, or whoever else she wants to treat at the moment, and says, "Happy to you! Happy to you!" It's the cutest thing ever.

Josie now has her two bottom teeth. It was the weirdest thing: she went down for a nap last Saturday with no teeth, then woke up with two. Now she's constantly sticking her tongue up, out, down, and all around, trying to figure out what the heck those things are in there. I can almost hear her..."Mom! I have a growth! Mom!" :) This kid has the longest tongue I've ever seen. She can literally curl it up and almost touch her nose. You'd think that I had an affair with Steven Tyler or something, heehee. I honestly don't know where this gene came from - one of her great grandparents must have had that one or something. It's like a sssss-snake!

As for me, I've been super-hormonal for the past two days... you know the story: yelling for no reason, crying for no reason, wanting to punch my husband for no reason... does anyone else have these issues?? Honestly, these hormone things are like the plaque. Haha! I mean, PLAGUE. (I wish I could just brush or floss them away, but that's not working too well, and it kind of hurts when I try :) Plus, a Hormone Dentist? Yikes; what kind of scary tools would that guy be using? Pardon me, I digress.

New joke from my friend Melissa (also a displaced Southerner like me):
Did you hear about the fire at the circus? It was intense.

Yes!!! This has the makings of another one of my favorite jokes. I'm all about the wordplays. Oh, and if you didn't get it, read it out loud. This cracks me up, almost as much as the infamous pretzel joke (see previous posts if you missed that little beauty!).

One more - this one is from "The Mitford Series" by Jan Karon - she lives in Blowing Rock and wrote this great Christian fiction series that makes me feel less homesick...

"An old man and an old woman were sitting on their front porch in the afternoon heat. She said to him, "I sure would like an ice cream sundae with chocolate sauce and nuts." He said, "That sounds good! I'll go down to the store and get us one." She said, "Maybe you should write it down; you're awfully forgetful these days!" After assuring her that he wouldn't forget, he leaves for the store and gets back about an hour later, carrying a paper bag containing two ham sandwiches. He hands it to her and she says, "SEE!? I TOLD you you'd forget!! I wanted MUSTARD on mine!"

Hardy har har - That one got me too. My grandpa would've loved that joke.

Friday, January 27, 2006

Maybe it's not just my kids...

This is Noah, my friend Chasity's little boy. He is a nut. I got him these "Billy Bob Teeth" for Christmas and he was thrilled.

And this is Noah's big sister, Kimmie. She was my first "baby." This is actually from last Christmas, but I think it's so funny that I decided to put it up now. Can you tell that she and Noah are related??

This is Chasity (the proud mom of these two and also of Dalton - I have no picture of him, since when I tried to take one, he yelled no and ran the other way :) holding Josie... she keeps saying, "Look at those cheeks! I just wanna SQUEEZE 'em!"

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

All Done!

*This is Sadie in her new overalls that Papaw Garry and Mamaw Sylvia got her for Christmas. Why couldn't I just get a smile like this one? Just one?

Tonight, we went to Picture People to get the girls' pictures made. I was SO excited, since I've always wanted to have them done there, and never have before because A: they are way too expensive, and 2: I have never before been so much of a glutton for punishment. Well, today, I had every mother's dream... a coupon! So we got all dressed up in the new outfits Grammy Gail paid for for Valentine's Day, we made arrangements to meet Deanna & Melissa at the mall, and off we went.

First of all, let me say this: I had it all together. Kids just woke from nap, so not sleepy. Kids just had snack, so not hungry. Kids just changed, so not dirty. Kids mine, so not normal.

Where oh where did I go wrong? We got to the store, and Sadie turned into a wacko. All we could figure out was that she was scared of the photographer (a guy wearing cowboy boots who was just a little on the odd side). Every time she went to sit on the bean bag, this dark cloud would come over her little face and out the bottom lip would come and start quivering. Then the whining began and she'd say, "Oh goodness (her new favorite exclamation), oh goodness. All done, all done." And she'd get up and try to get Deanna to pick her up or try to score Cheerios from Melissa. It was ridiculous. This happened over and over, and the whole time, Josie was sitting there on the bean bag, happy as a clam, smiling and laughing and looking like a Picture People poster child. Finally we bribed Sadie into sitting there for 2 seconds (Deanna had collateral - candy) and she actually stayed put. Of course, by this time, Josie was sick of the whole thing, too. In the only picture that was halfway decent of the two of them together, they both had red noses, snot and/or spit all over their chins, and they looked somewhat like pint-size headbangers. Geez. What a nightmare.

Poor photographer - I felt sorry for the guy. I asked him if he ever felt like smacking a kid. He said no, but I got the distinct feeling that he was lying. Anyway, I ended up with one pose of Josie - alone - taken back before the 2nd round of crying commenced. As far as professional pictures go, in the words of my child, I will just say this: "All done, all done!"

*Josie's learning to eat baby food... this is her showcasing her first taste of carrots. Yum!

Friday, January 20, 2006

I Believes it, Now That I Don't Sees It

Well, after much deliberation and discussion (good ones with my mother-in-law Beth and my good friend Brian, others with Jesse telling me that I'm nuts) I have come to the conclusion that the "thing" I saw in Josie's room was undoubtedly her very own guardian angel. The reasoning is this: After reading my Bible through twice in the past two years (and I'm starting on it again this year) I have found no reason to believe in actual "ghosts, or evil spirits," or whatever. I have come to believe that the "demons and evil spirits" in the Bible are sicknessness and diseases from which Jesus healed people (this comes from much study and also reading original Greek/Hebrew words that have been translated into the English). Becuase of this, I just don't think it could have been anything like evil incarnate, even though it scared me.

Enough about that, though... if you want to know more about what I think about that, just email me and I'll tell you. Back to the subject at hand. I realize that when angels appear to people in the Bible, usually the first thing they say is something like, "Don't be afraid." And why would they say that if people weren't scared out of their wits when they first saw them? So apparently, angels must be scary, at least at first. Maybe it's nothing more than the fear of the unknown, but that's a big fear! So the creepiness I felt when I first saw this thing was only normal. Now I'm thinking that it was a GOOD thing. Josie had a guardian angel, right in her room! Watching over her while she's sleeping! I mean, every night I pray for God to watch over them, but I never really thought that I'd see actual proof that He is. Wow.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Say What?

Did anyone know that I had twins?? Just kidding, but aren't these pictures amazingly similar? This is Josie 2 1/2 months (top) and Sadie at 3 months (bottom). I have beautiful babies, if I do say so myself.

I have nothing to write about today, so I thought I'd lighten the mood after that last posting - it was like a book!

So I got a fortune cookie that said, "You are strong and brave." I laughed.

My cousin Natasha told me a joke at Christmas... this was definitely my kind of joke:
"Two pretzels were walking down the street. One of them was assaulted."

Oh man... that cracked me up! Read it out loud, if you didn't get it the first time. Hehee!

Saturday, January 14, 2006


Last Sunday night about 10:30, Jesse and I went to Eat-N-Park, an all night greasy spoon restaurant just around the corner from where we live. We were the only ones there, with the exception of one very aged, hunched over, little old lady. We were seated at the booth right in front of hers, so I was facing her and Jesse was facing me with his back to her. As we sat there, talking and ordering our food, I found that my gaze kept returning to this lady. She was in her eighties, I guessed, and she had this pinkish blonde hair pulled back from her face into some impossible array... I think it must have been a wig. She had a little rhinestone headband - with several missing stones - stuck down into her hair. She wore an ill-fitting poinsettia-red dress of a typical old-lady type, and a tarnished brassy wedding set on her left hand.

This lady kept looking through a stack of photos on the table in front of her. As I watched, she carefully lined them up, side by side. She peered into each of them like she was looking into a mirror, holding one up now and then to get a closer view. Then she stacked them neatly back together, placing them first into a worn envelope and then into her purse. She withdrew another envelope, this one a faded lavendar one with scribbled writing on the front, and set it on the table in front of her. She finished her salad, pushed her plate to the side, took a sip of her water, and opened the envelope. The entire time, I couldn't stop watching her.

"She's all alone," I whispered to Jesse. "What if she has no one? It's late at night, and she's sitting here looking through old pictures! I bet her husband is dead; I bet she's lonely, and has no one to talk to, and no one to look at her pictures... I'm going to cry," I told him. Indeed, seeing this creature sitting there all alone, looking through the precious memories of her life at 11:00pm in a deserted fast food chain, struck a chord in me. I'm not sure why, but I could not contain myself.

I had to talk to her. I kept looking at her until she finally glanced up and caught my eye, and I asked, "Are those pictures of your grandchildren?" She smiled and said, "Some of them." I said, "May I see them? I love looking at pictures!" She invited me over, and I slid into the booth next to her. Her name was "Miss Betty," and she was 82 years old. As she slowly went through her pictures with me, the story of her life unfolded. She was married when she was just 17 to a man named John, whom she loved with a "young, special love". They were only together for four years when he was shipped overseas to "one of those wars, the one during 1942." I was touched to realize that this woman had lived through so many wars during her lifetime that The War, the Great War, had just become another war to her. She told me that John was killed in the South Pacific, and she had been widowed at the age of 21.

John had a brother, George. George was also overseas at the time that his older brother was killed. When the war was over and he returned to the States, he and Betty got together to mourn their loss and to plan their futures. As time went on, they realized that they shared more than a common bond through John. Eventually, they fell in love, got married, and had 5 children together. Their marriage lasted over 60 years.

"I lost George 2 months ago," she told me. "He was such a good man, a really good guy. And do you know, when he was in the hospital bed, he motioned for me to come over and when I did, he said to me, 'I have really enjoyed our time together. It has been a really good life with you. I wish we could just have a few more years together, even one or two. But I'll take what we had anyday.' I thought that was so nice of him to say. We had our ups and downs, but we really loved each other."

She showed me pictures of George with their grandson (one of sixteen grandchildren), the two of them at one of their anniversary parties, their little dogs, their garden in the backyard, Christmases and birthdays, weddings and births and funerals. I couldn't believe that she was letting me witness this extraordinary life - me, a complete stranger from a different world and a different time - in a green vinyl booth in the middle of the night.

I told her about my life, about Jesse and Sadie and Josie, and about my own grandparents - how he had been in that same war, how they had been married over 50 years, and how Grandpa died just 2 years ago. I told her how hard it has been for my Grandma, and she said, "Oh, does she live around here? Maybe we could get together to talk...." I could only wish. I wish that I could get the two of them together; I know they'd be fast friends and maybe, somehow, they could be a balm for eachother's soul.

As it is, I'll probably never see this lady, this "Miss Betty," ever again. But as Jesse was paying the check and I was getting up to leave, she put her hand on my arm, stared directly into my eyes and she said, "Everything is going to work out for you. Everything is going to be good for you, just like it was for me.
I can just tell. You believe me... you believe me."

And I did.

I Sees It, But I Don't Believes It

So the other night, I went up to Josie's room to check on her (I'm such a paranoid... I check on both of them at least 3 times a night). I was just going to make sure she wasn't cold, wasn't smushed against the side of the crib, WAS breathing, etc., and then go back out and close the door. However, when I looked into her room, I saw this thing at the head of the bed (she has a bed and a crib in her room). Mind you, it was dark in there, but this thing was darker than the darkish dark, if you know what I mean. And it was shaped like a short person, and the way it was positioned it looked like it was standing on the bed, leaning up against the wall. I squinted my eyes and looked harder, but it was still there. Then I turned the lights on and back off again, and it was STILL there. Again. Still there. And no, it was NOT my own shadow in the doorway - I tried that one. I have no idea what it was, but it totally creeped me out. I thoroughly entertained the notion of snatching Josie out of her bed right then and there and bringing her down to sleep with me. But I tried not to panic. I mean, when the lights were on, it was gone, right? So it can't really be there, right? I am not a big believer in spooks (with the exception of Melanie's and my "Irish Spring" ghost), but I don't think it could have been an angel, either, because it gave me the creeps! I don't think God-sent angels would give you the creeps, do you?

Anyway, the next night I went up there and turned off all the lights and tried to see it again, but it never showed up. I can't figure out the exact positioning of the lights, the blinds on the windows, the moon, etc. It had to have been some weird trick of the lighting, but for the life of me I can't recreate it. Isn't that weird? Am I nuts, or do your eyes seriously play tricks on you as you get older? (Or maybe this low-cholesterol diet is taking its toll on me... my body is rebelling by trying to scare me to death.... it wants its junk food back!)

Jesse tells me that I have to stop being a baby... that I am the mommy, for Pete's sake. When Sadie or Josie come crying to me that they saw a monster, I can't scream, "Oh my gosh! Where?!" and run and hide. This is true, I suppose. But I am a chicken. What do mommy chickens do?

Friday, January 13, 2006

Oink, Oink

Today was not a good day. Yesterday, I had to have an in-office "procedure," shall we say, done at the doctor's office. We'll just leave it at that. Needless to say, all night last night and all day today, I've been popping Ibuprofen like crazy. Who knew it would hurt this much? Well, I guess the doctor did, but she didn't warn me because she wanted my money! Anyway, I've been somewhat of a grouch all day. I know, I know... it's hard to believe. :)

The kids were in a major crab-fest all day, too. I can almost see Josie's teeth in her bottom gum, so I know what her problem is, but Sadie? Sheesh. She's wearing me down, as Sarah would say. She cried at the drop of a hat today, which is pretty unusual. She's also scared to death of sitting on the counter now (I'm beginning to wonder if someone let her fall off and didn't tell me!). I used to sit her up there and let her legs dangle off the counter while she brushed her teeth or whatever, but now she starts crying, grabs on to me, and pulls my clothes off as she tries to CLIMB up me. It's weird. Maybe she's figuring out that she is not invincible, after all. This is the same girl who likes to climb the bookshelf up the back of the couch, do a backflip over it, and land on her head. I don't get it. I guess we all have our phobias. Mine are too numerous to list here.

Tonight, as she was crying (again) and screaming "No bed! No bed!" while I changed her diaper and put on her PJ's, I started telling her the story of the Three Little Pigs, which she's heard on numerous occasions and LOVES. Her favorite part is, of course, the huffing and puffing and blowing the house down. That's my favorite part, too. Anyway, as I told her the story, I got to the part where the Big Bad Wolf says, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!" By this time, I had Sadie's attention and so I asked her, "And what did the Little Pig say?" (Bear in mind that the Little Pig is supposed to answer, "Not by the hair of my chinny-chin-chin!") Instead of the usual, universally accepted answer, she yells out, "Oink, Oink!" I laughed out loud. I can't stay mad at Miss Crabbypants for long.

New family picture... Mommy & Daddy Crabbypants, and our two little piggies. :) Sadie obviously wasn't interested in the picture-taking festivities.

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Move It, Mommy

Today, I was trying to fix dinner and I was in Sadie's way (she was trying to get into the dishwasher to play with the knives). Of course, I would not move, so she looks up at me and says, "Move it, Mommy!" I was a little surprised. The vocabulary of this kid never ceases to amaze me. Sunday, after church, she picked up one of her little books and held it out in front of her like a hymn book and sang, "God, God, God, God, God!!!" That was pretty stinking cute. Josie likes hanging her head upside down these days. If I'm holding her or she's sitting on my lap, she'll lean way back and hang her head all the way upside down so the world is askew (it's only the beginning, my dear :). She thinks it's hilarious, and laughs her little chortle snort laugh. You should hear it.

Tonight, I finished my scrapbook! All of 2004 and 2005 packed into one (albeit very large) bursting at the seams book. I've decided to do one every 2 years. Hopefully. I almost cussed while I was trying to bind it together... I had to step on it to get it to close!!! Ridiculous. (Oh, Sadie has learned that word, too. And "disgusting." Which is what I taught her that cigarettes are: "dis-bluss-en."

Nothing much to report here. Still no snow. Whoopee!!! Still holding at only 5 pounds lost. But my pants are not nearly as tight. What does that say about me?

To those of you who care, my blog is now accepting anonymous comments, CINDI! :)

This is my beautiful "Sade-falfa" Bathtime is her favorite time of day! By the way, that's not blood on the wall of the tub... she got some tub crayons from Aunt Lydia for Christmas, and she draws all over everything with them. They're great - they wipe right off of the tub (yes, I have tried them myself :) What? Don't you ever get bored in the bathtub? I don't see why once we grow up we no longer have tub toys. This is the epitome of all that's wrong with the world! I want my squeaky elephant!

This is Josie in her new bathrobe that Grammie Gail got her for Christmas. Doesn't she have the rosiest cheeks ever?

Monday, January 09, 2006

One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Toilet

My mom gave Sadie a Cuckoo Clock for Christmas. This was a very special gift, since Sadie's great-grandma has one, and she absolutely LOVES it. She would listen to it over the phone every time her Grammie would call, just so she could squeal and say, "Cuckoo! Cuckoo!" So, my mom got her her very own for Christmas. However, this is not your ordinary cuckoo clock. It's supposed to have a "natural theme," and you're supposed to be able to hear rivers, woodland sounds, etc. when the cuckoo is, well, cuckoo-ing (I seem to be writing that word an awful lot). Unfortunately, every time it strikes the hour, a very loud, and very distinct FLUSHING sound precedes the cuckoo's call. It's the weirdest thing you ever heard. It's like this cuckoo is being caught off guard in the bird-john, yanking up his little bird-pants as fast as he can, and running pell-mell to the tiny little bird-door to stick out his little bird-head and yell "Cuckoo!" The whole thing is cuckoo, if you ask me.

And speaking of cuckoo, this is a grandparents/grandkids picture of the Lansing clan :) These kids are so funny!

Saturday, January 07, 2006

Saturdays: A Time for Cleaning, Sweating, and Being Generally Irritated

Today, Jesse was in a horrible mood. Therefore, I morphed into a bad mood myself. I just can't seem to be around irritable people without sponging it up myself. That's a bad characteristic to have. Just call me "SpongeDevone Kick-You-In-the-Pants." Anywho, today I took it upon myself to purge my - dun-dun, DUN - MAKEUP DRAWER! Someone please remind me that I never need to buy foundation again. Ever. Seriously. You'd think my face was as big as a Roulette wheel or something. Sadie helped... or as you could probably imagine, Sadie helped herself to my lipstick, mascara, and eyeliner. By the time she was finished, she looked like Elton John, late for church after a trip up White Oak Mountain.

Good news: I have lost 5 pounds. Bad news: I am starving. I found out that I have high cholesterol!!! Apparently, it is inherited. They want to put me on drugs, but I am determined to beat it by diet alone. We shall see. I am a bit stubborn, I've been told. But I don't believe it and I NEVER WILL!!! Hahaha. The sweating is coming up now... I'm headed to the treadmill. I just can't help but feel like a hamster on that thing. It probably doesn't help that sometimes I eat string cheese while I'm on there. I also watch "Dr.Phil" as I run. I love Dr.Phil. I guess you either love him or you hate him, but he's my hero. I guess I'm just desperate to hear someone say, "That dog don't hunt," and around here, he's my only hope. Sigh... I miss home. :)

So here is a new, improved picture of Sarah, since she hates the other one, although I found it to be altogether lovely. She is, shall we say, a bit on the picky side. I have no idea where she gets this, especially since her brother (that would be Jesse) could not care less about what he looks like - many of you have met the self-proclaimed "Plaid Man," and can vouch for me on this. Anyway, here you go, Sarah... this one's for you.

Sarah does this amazing thing with paper plates. It's a crazy ab-workout thing. You put your toes on the paper plates, act like you're doing a push-up, and then slide your feet all over the place. It works: Sarah has a 6 pack. I tried it: I have carpet burn on the end of my nose. LOL.

This picture is Sadie's famous "Hitler Moustache" picture. She stole a magic marker when I wasn't looking and drew this on herself. I love it. Doesn't she look like a meanie? She cracks me up. My mom told me that this is the exact same face that I make. I don't know what she's talking about. Am I not always perfectly pleasant and wonderful to be around?! :)

Thursday, January 05, 2006

The Greatest Book Ever! (Well, besides the Bible)

I just finished reading "Sisterchicks Do the Hula" by Robin Jones Gunn. Angela gave this to me for Christmas, and I started it Tuesday and finished it Wednesday! It was that good! I never thought I would enjoy Christian fiction so much (with the exception of the Mitford Series, which I adore - maybe because it's set in Blowing Rock, NC, and I'm homesick most of the time). Anyway, this book was fabulose-o. It totally reminded me of my own girlfriends. I'm so blessed to have them! Especially the ones I've known for years and years and years. You just don't form bonds like those with new friends, usually. Six of us that were friends all through high school are planning a "Girls' Trip" next summer. We're so excited that we can't even stand it... I for one, am already packed. It's not what you think... not because I'm so organized and ready to go, but because I HAVE NO HOME and I NEVER UNPACKED!!! :) I don't sound bitter, do I?

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

What Day is This?

I seem to be forgetting more and more as time goes on. Could it be that (gasp) I am getting old? I can't seem to remember what day it is anymore. Being off work for vacation certainly didn't help, and neither did the freakish things that hormones do to your body when you bear children.... I'm beginning to think that you never return to normal. I used to be Miss Organization. Now I am "Mrs. Huh?" Oh, well. We looked at property today to potentially build a house on, but they didn't want to subdivide it, and it was almost 4 acres, which is more than we want. So... the search continues. We have decided on Middlefield, which is like a farming community (complete with Amish horses and buggies) BUT with one important distinction: it has a Super Walmart. This is a very important factor in determining where I will live. If I have to be here in the frigid Anarctic plains of Northeast Ohio, I at least deserve the comfort of being able to find the furniture polish, nail polish, car polish, and Polish sausages all at once. And not have to stand in line for 7 hours to pay for it. As Rainman once said, Kmart sucks. That's all I have to say about that.

Next, I have received several comments, which I am thrilled about... One of them was from my sister-in-law, Sarah... This is her picture - isn't she hot? :) Heehee... More pictures of Sarah to come, but they'll probably be with the kids, so enjoy this lone shot. This was at our friend Deanna's wedding (I made that bouquet, by the way). Sadie was the flower girl. Let's see if I can find a picture of her....

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

A blog is a blog is a blog

So Melanie finally talked me into doing this. I must admit, I'm a bit intimidated. I haven't written much in, oh, say, the past 2 years (with the exception of the captions in my baby books). However, I figure that no one is really going to read this anyway (with the exception of Melanie, of course, and possibly 2 other people who care about my life :)

Anyway, this might be a good way to get my pictures out to everyone on a time-li-er basis (heehee - I know that's not a word...I was, after all, an English major). I keep filling up people's mailboxes with huge files of photos, so here we go. Wish me luck.

This is a picture of Sadie, telling me to look and see if she has any "boogies." This is a primary concern of hers at this point in her life. (Come to think of it, it's still a major concern of mine, too, especially when I'm out in public...).

This one is a picture of the girls (guess which ones are mine) while we were visiting our friends Brenda & Louis over Christmas vacation. Sadie thought these dolls were great... Josie just wanted to eat them.

And this is Josie in her new winter hat that her Grandma Beth made for her. Isn't it a hoot? Also pictured is her new favorite toy, a frog that sings a counting song (this is a gift from our friends Becky, Stephen, & Hailey). She loves this frog. I think it may be a "Snoop in the making." We'll see! She's already sucking her thumb like Sadie, so maybe she'll get attached to something, too.