Ahh… bedtime. The time of day that every tired mom longs for. The time when she can unwind, drink a cup of tea, put her feet up and catch up on her Dr. Phil episodes. (OK, maybe that last one is just me.)
Honestly, after putting in a 14 hour day “on the job” (or possibly even more if you work outside the home too) every woman deserves an hour or so to herself. Right?
Wrong.
My children will come up with any excuse to put off going to bed. Or maybe I should say staying in bed. They GO willingly enough. They just seem to pop back up after about fifteen minutes. They’re like Weebles. You know, “Weebles wobble but they won’t fall down.” My kids go to bed but they won’t stay down.
Here is a compilation of things that bother them so much that they come and bother me:
I need my Pocahontas doll. No, wait, I need my Dorothy doll. And she needs her dress buttoned. And she needs to take off her shoes.
I need the pink bear. No, not that one. The other pink bear. Or maybe it’s the one that’s upstairs. Will you go get it? (The last thing I want to do is go back upstairs again.)
I need another blanket. Or two more. This one is too fuzzy. That one is not fuzzy enough.
I have to go potty.
It's too hot in here. Could you turn on the fan?
The fan is making too much noise and I am freezing.
I am squished. There are too many pillows on this bed.
I need an extra pillow.
My feet are sticking out! Will you come and cover me up again?
I’m thirsty. Can you fill up my canteen?
This water tastes like clams! (Clams? Really?)
I heard a thump. A thump! Did you hear that thump?
I have to go potty.
I need another kiss. And another hug.
I keep thinking about Gremlins. Why did Daddy let me see those Gremlins? It was a bad idea, Mommy. (I would have to agree on this one.)
We should not have read that story about Medusa.
My hair is tangled. Like snakes. Can you brush it out again?
How many days is it until my birthday?
The wind is howling! Thunder! I hear thunder!
There is a spider on the ceiling. Can you come and squish it?
I needed to tell you that I love you. (How can I get mad about that one?)
I’m hungry. I could really use a banana right about now.
There are crumbs on my sheets. I have no idea how they got there.
I think I have a bug bite. Look at this red dot.
I have to go potty.
I need the itch-stick. I need a band-aid!
I have a hangnail. I need the clippers.
My head hurts. My tummy hurts. I need an ice pack. I need medicine.
Josie won’t stop talking and so I can’t fall asleep!
I had a bad dream. (You haven’t been asleep yet!)
I’m scared. It’s too dark in here. Can I have a flashlight?
I have to go potty.
from my 1/29/12 article for www.mentorpatch.com
