This morning I woke up after a terrible night’s sleep with two deadlines looming, a filthy house, five overflowing laundry baskets, ants sneaking in through a crack in the floor, an empty milk carton in the fridge, kids who needed to be fed (and bathed and given a math lesson), dog poop on my front walk, a crying baby and a terribly achy back.
I just wanted to hide in the bathroom and cry.
As soon as I locked the door, though, someone (make that two someones) knocked, jiggled the knob and then proceeded to stick their little fingers through the crack under the door.
I looked in the mirror. Big mistake. That did not make me feel better at all. I need a haircut. I need a facial. I need to go to the gym. Let’s face it; I need a complete makeover. But who has time (or money) for all of that stuff? Certainly not me – sometimes I don’t even have time to take a shower, much less spend a day at the spa.
Every mom can relate to this, right?
I know I’ve felt this way before, and I’m sure I’ll feel it again.
What I really don’t understand is why people – moms especially – feel like they need to put on a show so that the rest of the world will think that their life is perfect and that they have it all together.
We’ve all seen them – the moms straight from the cover of Parenting magazine with their pointy high heels and their fabulous figures. In tow are their perfectly dressed, perfectly behaved children.
Not ONE of those kids has magic marker staining the front of their shirt or mismatched socks or even “static hair.” They look perfect. Those kids don’t lick the glass door at the mall, toot on their dermatologist or pull two dozen books off the shelf at the library as the stroller goes by. (I’m not admitting to any of these things, mind you.)
But I know it’s a charade! My question is, what makes us, as moms, care what other moms think? Why are we so competitive? I would rather know that there are other women out there in the trenches with me. Others feeling isolated and freaked out and just a teensy bit crazy. That would make me feel better.
And honestly, sometimes I feel so overwhelmed that it’s hard to even get a breath.
So I’m going out on a limb here to say this:
Moms! I am here to tell you that you are not alone out there! Everyone feels like hopping a plane to Tahiti once in a while and leaving it all behind! It doesn’t mean you are a bad mom!
I, for one, want everyone to know that sometimes my life can really stink. I’m not trying to complain; I just want to be honest with all of you other moms out there - even the "Perfect-o Moms." You know who you are.
Don’t get me wrong – I love my husband. I love my children, my house, my job. I love my life.
But right now, I just want to go sit in a hot tub and listen to some Ray Lamontagne and cry until I feel better.
Some chocolate probably wouldn’t hurt, either.
-from my 2/12/12 article for www.mentorpatch.com
