Hale's Bales

Sadie, Josie, and I went to Hale Farm and Village last week and it was so interesting! We got a "Life in the 1800's packet" to study beforehand, so they learned several sayings of the day. Josie's favorites were "Spare the rod and spoil the dog" (oh wait - she changed that:) and "Pulled the wool over YOUR eyes!" She's tricked me several times since then and laughs and laughs about it.

We also learned to "make a courtesy" (curtsy), how to make butter, that log houses were mortared with poop, we made Johnnycakes (YUM), we built a farm - on paper, of course - and Sadie liked the saying "Bought the farm!" We did the entire packet, and they had NO idea that they were learning. I love that about homeschooling. They learned more in a couple of days that they will always remember than they would've in a classroom, I'm sure!

We had a great day hanging out with our little group (mainly Jasmine and Camille - those girls are FUNNY) and learning lots of neat stuff. Josie's favorite part was the teacher in the one-room schoolhouse. All of the girls were very impressed by the way she came around to inspect their hands to see if they were clean or not, and the way she did her lessons. They also liked the punishments! Girls had to stand against the wall with a book on their heads for 5 minutes; if the book fell off, she had to add another 5 minutes! Harder than it looks! The boys, however, had to "toe the line" and get swatted! Youch!

The weather was gorgeous, too... not too cold, not too hot. It was VERY muddy and we were thankful for our new rubber boots! Up until about 2pm we were having a great time, hitting all the educational spots like the dairy, the Indian camp, the potter's shed, the church, the doctor's house, etc. but then a major thunderstorm blew in and they closed the place down! We were disappointed that we didn't make it to the General Store or the Blacksmith Shop, but we're planning on going back for a private trip with Becky and James, Teagan, and Ireson sometime later this summer.

Hairy Situation

Seems like a lot of my thoughts that I used to get out while blogging are now getting out through another creative outlet: my weekly newspaper column. I am neglecting my blog for the first time in SIX YEARS! I feel bad about it, too. I must remedy the situation.

The other day Becky came over, and we decided that Jed is definitely going to have red hair like hers. She came up with the patent-pending "Becky-Toupee" idea, and so here you have a preview of what is to come:

Most Beautiful?

We enter a local restaurant for dinner. I see the look of panic in the cute little 20-something server’s eyes when I ask for a table for six, including a high chair and a sling for the baby’s car seat.

She definitely has her work cut out for her. Meanwhile, as someone who recently gave birth to a gigantic baby, I feel a bit self-conscious as we follow her skinny-jean-wearing self to the back corner of the room.

We play musical chairs, trying to decide where I can best “hide” to nurse the baby and who is going to sit by Adelaide, who is well-known for spilling drinks, spitting out half-chewed broccoli and generally being hard to get along with while at the table.

Unfortunately, the restaurant has a TV blaring in the corner. Since they become blank-eyed, staring zombies any time there is a television in their vicinity, I try to limit my kids’ television exposure. Tonight, we have no choice but to watch and listen.

My husband and I take turns at the salad bar while the girls get busy decorating their placemats with their crayons, stopping now and then to gaze at some random cleavage, some product that’s currently deemed sexy. I don’t want them to think those things are acceptable. Even though I feel insecure about my own appearance at the moment, I never want them to feel that way about themselves. I remember why I don’t let them watch TV.

I order “the usual:” three grilled cheese sandwiches and three orders of veggies for them. I decide to splurge and let them have sweet tea instead of their usual water with lemon.

A few minutes later, you can tell it’s us by the pile of grilled cheese crusts and melted ice on the floor, the pickle that landed two tables over, the screeching baby, the pile of jackets in the corner and the three tic-tac-toe covered kids’ menus on the table.

After filling a bowl up with peaches from the salad bar for the third time, I return to our table just in time to hear a loud TV announcement about The World’s Most Beautiful Woman.

My husband zones the girls in by waving his hand in front of their faces so they’ll glance away from the TV. He asks my daughters who they think The World’s Most Beautiful Woman is. Adelaide, the 2-year-old, says, “I am!” Sadie, the thinker, says, “I just don’t have any idea – let me think.” Josie, the emotional one, looks straight at me and says, “You are, Mommy.”

I look down at my spit-up stained, freshly drooled-on shirt, my yoga pants (my jeans still won’t fit since my last pregnancy), mismatched socks and ragged nails. I think of my frizzy, neglected hair, the bags under my eyes and the extra 30 pounds I still need to lose.

I smile, touched by Josie’s sweetness, by her unsolicited, immediate response to such a question.

I look over at the frazzled waitress as she brings over yet another stack of extra napkins. Thanks to us, she’s having a bad night. I wonder how she still looks like she just stepped out of a magazine.

But if my little girl thinks I am The World’s Most Beautiful Woman, then maybe I am.

From my April 17th article on www.mentorpatch.com

April Update

While playing with her Legos, Sadie must've switched over to her Sunday School lesson. She broke all her towers apart and yelled, "And then the Holy Spirit rained down on them!"

Sadie admonished one of her friends: "Do not stick your tongue out, that's almost like spitting, and people spit on Jesus when they were crucifying Him!"

Sadie, chanting: "I'm from the IRS! I'm from the IRS"
Josie, tired of hearing it: "Yeah, well, I'm from the USA!"

Josie to Sadie: "Remember when you were four and I was three and Daddy used to pick one of us up in each arm and carry us around? (sigh). Those were the days."

While listening to Josh Turner's country song, Josie asks, "Did he say MEAN God?" "No, no, I answered. It's Me AND God."

Adelaide, recalling her dip in the hot tub at Grandma Beth's: "And we were at Gwandma's and we got into her big baftub and she put bubbles in dere and I got bubbles up to my BEARD! You mean your chin? YEAH!"

Josie ordered ficken chingers at LongHorn.

Adelaide, with my breast pump apparatus on her head: "Look I'm the tin man!"

Jedidiah found his toes, is kicking his toys on his bouncy seat, grabbing hair and earrings, and drooling like a crazy man!

Adelaide's Song

Adelaide's Song

"I like to pee in the FLOOO-OOR...
Oh no I don't I'm just kidding
Twinkle twinkle little star...
Suck your thumb and dance with me
Quack quack, you're a fuzzyhead
And that's my SONG! The end!"

The Bike Lesson

“The first lesson that you have to learn when riding a bike is how to fall,” my husband explains to our 5-year-old daughter. “If you never fall – if you’re too afraid to fall – you’ll never learn how to ride.”

Buckling on her pink and purple Barbie helmet, she swings her little leg up and over her sparkly princess bike. She settles in for the ride, a determined look on her face.

She takes off down the driveway with her dad running along behind her, holding onto the back of her seat to give her extra balance. She likes the extra stability of knowing that he’s there.

He lets go when she least expects it.

She zooms along with a triumphant look on her face. “I’m doing it! I’m doing it!” she yells over her shoulder, making sure we’re watching. Suddenly she’s free. She’s flying, soaring, the wind in her hair.

Unfortunately that first beautiful taste of childhood freedom never lasts for long. Wobbly handlebars, teetering wheels and a crash on the sidewalk led to a skinned knee, a scraped knuckle and tears of embarrassment.

“Falling isn’t something to cry about or to be ashamed of. It’s part of learning,” her dad tells her as he checks to make sure she’s okay. “The next lesson that you have to learn is how to get back up. Every time you fall you can be one step closer to your goal, but only if you get back up.”

I think about those words. They apply to so many other things in life besides learning to ride a bicycle.

Sometimes people let go of us when we least expect it. Things don’t always turn out how we want them to. Sometimes our plans don't work out; sometimes our dreams end up as just dreams.

I think about the freedom, the joy, the exhilaration that comes along with growing up. I think about the crashes, the tears and the pain. We all fall sometimes.

And we all have to learn to get back up.

I don’t think her daddy realizes just how much he might be teaching her during this afternoon lesson. I don’t speak metaphorically to point this out. I don’t draw parallels for him, or tell him he’s like a wise old sage.

No, I don’t mention any of these things as she untangles herself, brushes the dirt off her hands, wipes her eyes and takes a deep, raggedy breath.

I just stand back and watch as she climbs back on.


From my April 10th article on www.mentorpatch.com

Unlucky Girl Makes Me Appreciate Simple Things

My fourth article from www.mentorpatch.com!

She talked of places she wished she had been – places she wished someone would have taken her – the zoo, the museum, the park.

The girl, we’ll call her Becca, recently turned 18 and therefore “aged out of the system,” leaving the safe haven of a school for abused, neglected, and underprivileged teens. When I learned her story last week, she was on the way back into her reality – a home that had been anything but a haven during her childhood years.

She wished for someone to bake cookies with her.

Instead, she was neglected by her mother, hungry, malnourished.

She dreamed of planting a garden outside in the fresh air.

Instead, she hid in a closet, trying to become invisible.

She wanted to learn to make clothes for her doll, maybe a dollhouse.

Instead, she learned that no place was permanent, no place was safe.

Now expecting her own child, she hopes for a new beginning. She believes those that hurt her in the past have changed. She believes she can create a better life for the child within her.

While Becca dreams of her future, I can’t help but think of her past – the little girl she could have been. The little girl she might have been. The little girl she should have been.

Will anyone take the time to teach this young woman how to be a mother? Will she break the cycle of neglect and abuse into which she was born?

As adults, and especially as parents, we are in a position of great power. But as we learned from Spider-Man, with great power comes great responsibility. Circumstances like Becca’s seem hopeless. There are so many who need our attention; there are so few hours in our day. Is there something – anything – we can do?

The world is full of opportunity.

I remember the story about the little boy who spent every morning throwing the starfish that washed up on the beach back into the ocean. A man saw his determination to finish such an endless, thankless task. He said, “You can’t save all of them. How can you possibly make a difference?” As he threw another starfish back into the water to live another day, the little boy said, “I made a difference to that one!”

Maybe we can’t make a difference to everyone. But can we make a difference to just one? Could we change the world for a little girl like Becca? Definitely.

When my 6-year-old asks to bake cookies in the kitchen, I’m inclined to think of the mess, of the chaos that will ensue. What I should think of is the opportunity I have to spend time with her.

When she asks me to dig in the dirt with her outside, I should jump at the chance, not complain about the mess all over the driveway. When she wants to learn to sew, I shouldn’t cringe at the thought of her wielding a needle – I should hold her in my arms and teach her.

These are simple things to us. But as I learned from Becca – not so far removed from the little girl she once was – the simple things might just mean everything.

Messy, Messy

My April 3rd article from www.mentorpatch.com

“Mommy! I peed in the bed!"

There’s nothing like that little declaration to jump-start your day. And so it begins.

"Mommy! I spilled the juice! I dumped my raisins in the couch! I have gum in my hair! I have mud on my pants! I got dog poop on my shoe! I have syrup on my hands! I have marshmallow on my face! I have cheese in my ear!” I have (fill in gross substance and various body part here)!

Recently, my 2-year-old managed to break a big bottle of cooking wine all over my kitchen floor. She was fine, and nobody got a boo-boo, but you can imagine the huge mess I had to clean up.

In addition to the sticky tile, the spill also left me with what smelled like a pint-size wino. I was somewhat concerned that we might encounter a policeman at the grocery store. Really, who wants the authorities to smell alcohol on their kid’s Garanimals?

On the other hand, she probably did me a favor because I had to clean it up. I used to be a neat freak. Back in the old days, you could eat off my kitchen floor. These days, you really could eat off my kitchen floor (because it contains the crumby equivalent of half a loaf of bread).

Since having my fourth child, I’m of the “clean only when absolutely necessary” mindset.

The only way my kitchen floor seems to get mopped these days is if one of my girls accidentally spills water on it and I have to wipe it up. I spread it around as much as possible, to create a two-foot "clean radius."

Sometimes I don’t even bend over to do it, much less scrub it on my hands and knees like my mom taught me. Throw a clean rag down to soak up the water, and let your foot do the wiping. If you’re coordinated enough, you can kick the damp rag in the air and catch it without ever having to bend over.

I guess I should put as much effort into actually cleaning as I put into thinking about ways to avoid it. But like all moms, I'm busy. I’m tired. I'm overscheduled. I'm in need of a nap.

Life with kids is messy. When you're someone like me who appreciates order and a set schedule (hey, I said I appreciate it, not that I actually achieve it), then the chaos (and dirt) that takes over when you have grubby little kids running around is a challenge. Kids get dirt on your clean floors. They drool on your shirt. They crumble on your bed. They get grape juice on the counter. They get Play-Doh in your carpet. They get (fill in anything icky and random area in your house here).

Love is messy, too, though. If it were too clean, too easy, it would be boring instead of exciting. Life, love, being a mom … it’s one big mess, isn’t it? But sometimes a big ol’ kiss from sticky little chocolate-milk-flavored lips makes the mountains of used paper towels worth it.

Um, Sweetie? Could you spill some of your water over here? There's a sticky spot on the floor.

Sadie is Seven!

On Sadie's actual birthday, (Jesse gave her a brand new pink bike in the morning - she's outgrown her other bike already) we all went out to El Rodeo as a family. Sadie got to wear the birthday sombrero, and Josie was super excited to give her a little pink tote bag with Starbursts inside. From us, she got some pink cowboy boots, her very own HUGE bath towel, new hot pink flip-flops, a fairy-flap book, a Rapunzel Barbie, and a Left Center Right game. We really had a fun time together there... it's definitely our favorite place to eat, even if there ARE six of us now!!

The following Saturday, we went to a tea room for her birthday party (she wrote out her invitations herself - cute!). We got all dressed up (even Daddy wore a coat and a hat), including ME - I wore gloves AND a big floppy hat. Sadie wore a little pearl colored dress with pearl trim and buttons, Josie wore a black, white, and pink dress (and her bear-bear wore a matching one) and Adelaide wore a white and blue dress with her new cute white and pink hat. We looked cute, if I do say so myself. The girls (all eight of them) sat at their very own table and were very ladylike with their very own china cups and a birthday cake shaped teapot. They had berry berry tea, double decker PBJ sandwiches, fruit kabobs, chips, cookie wands, and princess cupcakes. The food seemed to be a big hit, and it was so cute to watch all of them giggling and being "ladies" together.

Snippets

Adelaide and I went to Sam's Club and to run some other errands. By the time we we were almost finished, she was getting grumpy. I said, "I think you need a nap." She replied, "I do not need a nap. I need a donut."

Melissa and Caroline had an impromptu sleepover here last week while Josie was gone with Jesse to visit Uncle Les and Aunt Sharon in Maryland. I caught Sadie in the family room in the pink Princess chair, reading stories to Adelaide and Caroline, who were sacked out on the floor on pillows for "story-time." Josie, meanwhile, was having a blast during her "special Daddy time," checking out Les and Sharon's house, eating chicken wings and noodles, and picking Grandma up at the airport.

I cannot find the cute little blue stripey tobaggan that Grandma Beth bought for Jed ANYWHERE. It was really cold the other morning when we left to go to Bible Study, so I had to put his red and white striped pointy elf hat on (that Sarah got him at Christmas). Needless to say, he was a HUGE hit with the ladies in my group! He gets passed around most every week, but he looked extra cute in his elfey hat.

The three girls and I made pizzas for lunch last week. It's nice to have them all together in the kitchen with me, but since they all like to sit up on the counter, butt-space is at a premium! They love eating the teeny little pepperonis off the pizzas, just like Angela and I used to do.

Last week, I did a Facebook/email fast day to go along with 40 Days for Life. It was MUCH harder than I thought it would be to unplug myself from the world! Now when I tell Sadie to unplug (her thumb) I think I will feel a little more empathetic.

Crimes moms commit: Purgery - stuffing broken toys into a trash can and sneaking it out to the curb. I need to commit more purgery!!!

On Jesse's birthday, we went out while Grammie watched the kids for us. He decided to give ME a present on his birthday: a restaurant with an Elvis impersonator! I took their picture together (he also got photo-bombed by a guy sitting behind us, who I asked what he thought he was doing?! when he got up to leave :). My picture caption: Elvis with a Jesse impersonator. You can tell it's not really him becuase he's got on a Detroit Lions shirt.

Josie started going to golf lessons with her Daddy a couple of weeks ago. Apparently, she's a natural! He says she has a natural follow through, which coupled with her left-handedness, makes her a mini-pro. Who knows? Maybe she'll be a Tigress Woods one day (minus the creepy parts, of course).

I asked Adelaide, who was dressed up in a ballerina tutu, if she could be any cuter, and she said, "Nope!"

Reminisce

I can't believe that my first baby, my sweet Sadaroo, is going to be SEVEN tomorrow. SEVEN! It seems like just yesterday, we were bringing her home from Davis Hospital, a tiny little thing in a pink and yellow jacket. I was TERRIFIED when Jesse pulled onto I40 next to a tractor trailer. Her life seemed so fragile - I couldn't stand to think that we were so helpless and she was completely in my hands to protect! It was the longest car ride of my life! Tonight, when I hugged her goodnight, I realized that it was the last time I would ever hug my SIX-Year-old Sadie. Sigh. She's growing up so fast, and I love her so much.

Please stay little
Just a little while longer
Don't grow up so fast
Pleast stay little
Just a little while longer
I want this moment to last.

Ask Adelaide Why

and she will answer:

Cause I do.
Cause I am.
Cause I was.
Cause I wasn't.
Cause I did.
Cause I didn't.

Storytime

My third column from www.mentorpatch.com - this one made me cry. Seriously - I'm such a sap.

"Just one more, Mommy?" Josie asked as we sat in the rocking chair in her room.

"Please?" We had already read two stories, and it was time for bed.

I love those just-bathed, damp-haired, sweet-smelling, teeth-brushed, pajama-wearing moments when my girls climb onto my lap and snuggle in for a good story.

It takes me back to when I was a little girl and my daddy used to read to me every night. Since he worked long hours, bedtime was our special time together. More than the stories themselves, I remember the safe, happy feeling of being held on his lap in our old, bright orange ‘70s-era rocking chair.

I hope my girls will remember the feeling, too.

Sometimes they know the stories better than I do. They can quote Goodnight Moon or The Foot Book word for word. Sometimes I share one of my childhood favorites like Scuffy the Tugboat or Sylvester and the Magic Pebble. (I still have practically every book I’ve ever owned – I can't bear to part with them. They are like old friends).

Sometimes they try to convince me to read Love You Forever, a story about a mommy who sneaks in and watches her child sleeping at night as he grows up before her eyes. This book brings me to tears by the third page every time I read it. For some reason, my girls think it’s funny to see Mommy sniffling into a tissue and bawling like a baby.

Sometimes they get to choose from The Library Bag, which we usually restock every week or two. They dig through the bag like they're hunting for treasure.

They always find it.

We laugh together at Papa Bear's misadventures. We cry together when Laura Ingalls' old bulldog, Jack, dies. We sleepily whisper sing-song lullaby stories to each other. I realize that we are sharing more than just a book.

Now I know why my daddy took that special time to read with me. Soon my girls will be able to read their own stories. Soon they will be too big to sit on my lap. Soon they will be busy with things deemed more important than tonight's all-important bedtime story.

I look at Josie's rosy cheeks, the hopeful look in her eyes. I say, "OK, just one more."

Or maybe two.

Mean Old Mommy

My second column for www.mentorpatch.com was conveniently about our LONG LONG LONG (and long-awaited) trip to North Carolina.

"Can I hava snack? Can I?"

"Did you see dat? Did you?"

"Is my baby brudder sweeping? Is he?"

Two-and-a-half-year-old Adelaide decided to see how many questions she could ask before I went bonkers during our trip to North Carolina to visit family.

Sadie, 6, and Josie, 5, have been making this trip since they were born. They listened to their Little House on the Prairie CDs, trashed the back seat, sang songs, played with the dirty gravel they painstakingly chose from the Bob Evans parking lot, practiced their Southern accent ("over yonder," "I caint!" and “don’t pull my hay-urh!”), worked some dot-to-dots and then conked out, drooling on their pillow pets. They learned long ago how to make the best of the situation.

I, however, learned something new this trip: traveling with four kids is hard. Since I'm still nursing my 4-month-old – it's almost impossible to breast-feed at 75 miles an hour – what should've been eight hours turned into 10.

Whoever said getting there is half the fun obviously never had very much fun when they got there.

After 13 trips to gas station potties, two juice box explosions, a headache, three fights, one finger mashed in a window and a trail of goldfish crackers on the floor of the minivan, I turned into what my kids call "Mean Old Mommy."

Mean Old Mommy decreed mandatory quiet time until we counted 20 green highway signs. Mean Old Mommy refused to turn off Amos Lee in favor of the more popular Artist Currently Known as Raffi. Mean Old Mommy chewed gum and did not share. Mean Old Mommy is, well, mean.

Four-month-old Jedidiah's one major crying fit just happened to coincide with the beginning of everyone else’s nap. His feeding postponed by 15 minutes because of a missed exit, my sweet little boy retaliated against my starvation tactics with eight minutes of crying, four minutes of wailing, and three minutes of "What kind of a mother are you?" in baby language.

All the racket meant that chatty Adelaide slept for all of 10 minutes out of those 10 long hours. For the other 9 hours and 50 minutes, she talked. And talked.

“Could you please be quiet for two minutes? Just two?” Mean Old Mommy asked. Adelaide crossed her arms, squinted her eyes in the rearview mirror and said, “Well, dat wasn’t vewy nice.” She was right. It wasn't.

Finally across the state line, I was relieved to announce (in my Normal Mommy voice) that, yes, we were finally in North Carolina.

She studied me a few seconds, looked around her and said, "No, we are not. We are still in de car."

Finally Made It

We had a relatively uneventful trip down to NC this time, but it was LONG. We ended up being in the car (and out, since we stopped FOUR times) about 10 hours, total. The kids were really good, but Adelaide ended up sleeping for only 10 minutes out of those 10 hours. She talked incessantly for the other 9 hours and 50 minutes. She asked over and over, "Are we goin' to Norf Carelina? ARE WE?" However, she must not understand yet what North Carolina actually is, because once we crossed the state line and I told her we WERE in NC, she said, "No, we are not. We are in DE CAR."

My mom drove 1/3 of the way and I drove 2/3. It sounds strange, but I was happy to smell the chicken poop when we crossed into good old Wilkes County! That's how I knew I was finally home after a whole year of being north of the Mason-Dixon! I went for BoJangle's for breakfast Saturday morning, and they were doing a fundraiser for MDA (Jerry's Kids) where they put those little signs up with the names of the people who donated. Wouldn't you know that one of the names was BUBBA?! It made me feel like I was really home.

Thomas, Elizabeth, and Josh came over to see us and Sadie ran out to meet them, yelling, "Hey, Uncle Thomas!" then Josie ran out saying, "Uncle Thomas! I missed you!" then Adelaide saw him and said, "AAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" and ran away, craying. Oh well, 2 out of 3 ain't bad, they always say.

I was afraid that she'd be scared of EVERYONE, since she hasn't been to NC since she was about 18 months old and doesn't really remember anyone, but when we got to Daddy's and Sylvia's, she wasn't scared a bit. Daddy leaned over to unbuckle her from her carseat and I braced myself for screaming and crying. Instead, she grinned up and him and said, "Hewwo, Papaw!" Sadie and Josie also threw themselves at him and Mamaw for hugs. I love seeing my children with their Papaw :) I asked Adelaide later why she wasn't scared, and she said, "Cuz. That's my stinker Papaw."

Caleb and Cameron (who have grown like crazy over the past year - Cameron is now a mini version of Scotty) came down with Sharon to visit and meet Jedidiah, and it didn't take long for all the cousins to break into full playing mode. The best thing I heard all evening was (from Josie and Caleb) "Okay. Now we are going to play tag in the dark! Isn't that a good idea!?"

Then Sadie and her Great Grandma Genevieve stayed up late last night (prior to a terrible night of crying/screaming earache pain from Sadie) 'sorting' all of Grandm'as lipstick and Sadie got to pick out FIVE tubes of lipstick to take home with her... because we all know that a six year old NEEDS a LOT of lipstick.

Sadie ended up with an earache on Sunday, so Josie went to have special Papaw/Mamaw time all by herself. She wanted to eat lunch at a Chinese buffet and then she went shopping with them. Papaw bought Josie a mermaid to play with in the tub, and she bought him some gum. Mamaw also gave her a really cool sparkly gold purse to carry her treasures in. She came home with a gift for everyone (I got a pretty greenish angel bell to replace the one I had to throw away in the flood), but the best was a big yellow smiley-face balloon for her baby brother - he watched it like a hawk! Mamaw said it was hard for the store clerk to reach so she tried to talk Josie into choosing another one, but nothin' doin' - she wanted THAT one for Jed.

One of my favorite parts of going to NC is sharing my scrapbook with my aunt Sharon. She seems to be the only one in the world who really appreciates it! :) While she and I perused my hard work and Adelaide and the baby napped, the girls were impressed to see Papaw working on a new axe! Then they went out for pizza at Village Inn (our favorite), and Mamaw told Sadie some new stories while Papaw built a wooden model of a forklift with Josie.

Later, Adelaide decided that her new name for my Daddy is "Old Papawhead." Josie decided that Mamaw is a great and wonderful cook because she LOVES her Thousand Island salad dressing (she ate three bowls of salad for supper)!

We all went over to Annie's (my daddy's sister's) to play with Lauren, and though Adelaide hid behind the TV from EVERYONE ("Because I'm vewy shy," she said) Josie had a great time playing indoor tag with her cousin while Sadie sorted out Lauren's entire play kitchen... for FUN.

The old stand-by, livermush, made its appearance, along with the ever-popular Bo-Berry biscuits from BoJangles! I laughed when I saw a name-tag in the drive-thru window with the name "Bubba" on it. Adelaide got to make biscuits with Great Grandma, and Sadie learned to make cornbread! Now, if I could just learn to make chicken and dumplings the way she does!

We got to go to Melanie's to have play time and lunch with her and Ada. For lunch, she made mac & cheese, hummus, and frozen grapes. My girls thought it was the best lunch ever. It was warm enough to play outside, so after watching Sadie do some kind of crazy (SCARY) flip off of the swingset, we headed into the BEST part of the visit: fresh disgusting entrails under the porch. All of the girls were completely fascinated by this!

When Cameron and Caleb came over to play (they spent the evening at Angela's on another night) they all got a little bit too rambunctious and Grandma made them all sit on the couch! It reminded me of the old days when she used to make me and Angela hug each other and tell each other "I LOVE YOU!" when we were mad. It was torture!

On Wednesday, I went to lunch with Chasity, my little buddy. The kids stayed at Great Grandma's and had a well-deserved PJ day until we went over to see Papaw and Mamaw at 4:00. Sadie got to ride up in the lift in the garage while he changed the oil in my car, and then she had a checker match with Papaw, followed by a marathon story-time by Mamaw. Josie and Papaw and Adelaide played catch. They think it's hilarious when he bonks them on the head with the ball. Then Josie walked on his back since his back was hurting. He played Rocky top on the guitar for them and we all sang - I think I'm the only mom in the world (at least up north!) with three little girls who sing Rocky Top all the time!

Mamaw kept the girls for me while I ran errands and went to lunch with Sherry on Thursday. They told stories, painted fingernails, watched Tom and Jerry, and had a big old time. I laughed when I got there because they had all stripped off their clothes because the woodstove had it STIFLING in there. Adelaide had made it down to her pull-up and nothing else. Jedidiah was fussy and crying until Papaw picked him up out of his seat and then he proceeded to coo and be absolutely adorable for the rest of the afternoon. Papaw called him "Yunior" most of the time (which is his funny way of saying Junior). They loved going for walks in the woods with him, but Josie was on the lookout (and terrified by) ticks!

The scariest (and funniest) part of our visit was when Josie hopped in the tub while I put Jedidiah's PJs on. We were all in the living room, which is literally FEET from the bathroom so I didn't think it was dangerous to leave her in there... I could call and say, "Josie?" and she'd say "I'm okay!" Well... Josie likes to 'relax' when she's in the tub by herself. She leans all the way back in the water, floating on her back with her ears under and her arms stretched out, floating at her sides. When my mom called, "Josie?" No answer. "Josie?" I said, a little louder. No answer. My mom got up and ran into the bathroom, saw Josie laying there with her arms spread out, eyes rolled up, still as a mouse, and SCREAMED, "OHHH! HELP ME LORRRRRD!!! Devone!!!!" I raced in there, just in time to see Mama yanking Josie by one arm up out of the water. You should've seen Josie's face, shocked and dripping, yanked rudely out of her bath, saying, "Whatthe...?" Mama was so relieved she couldn't stand up for two hours. Her knees buckled! Josie apologized, even though she wasn't really doing anything wrong. She couldn't hear us calling for us because her little ears were under the water! :) She, Sadie, and Adelaide all three went around for DAYS yelling "HELP ME LORRRD!" and cracking up at themselves.

We had a really good trip, though we were definitely ready to come back home after 13days and a lot of car trouble (Daddy finally fixed a fuel injector and got it running right again). I'm very happy that all 4 of my children have been able to meet their Great Grandma Genevieve. Not many people are blessed to know and be known by their great grandparents... it's truly a blessing.

Flooding

This is from my new weekly column, called 'Mama Says.' Visit www.mentorpatch.com to read it every Sunday!!

Sleep was elusive at my house this past Sunday night due to the howling wind outside and the howling little girls inside.

My three daughters – ages 6, 5 and 2 – were terrified of the storm. (Their baby brother slept through the whole thing.) And they informed me that there was no way they could possibly return to their own beds until it was over.

Everyone in Mentor was probably as happy as we were to see the sun rise Monday morning. But that was before we all looked into our basements.

Our sump pump had fizzled in the wee hours of the morning. I couldn't help but be reminded of that old song, You Left Me Just When I Needed You Most.

Like you, I donned my boots (waders, since I married a fisherman) and steeled myself to throw away piles of painstakingly saved soggy preschool papers, ruined by 20 inches of murky water. I sorted through dripping mountains of my babies' clothes that I had planned to save for my grandchildren.

Since this was our first (and hopefully our last) experience with flooding, my heart felt a new kind of pain when I found a ruined pair of tiny pink shoes – the ones my 6-year-old wore when she was just learning to walk.

A bookshelf that my dad made for me when I was heading off to college, the velvet-robed angel that had always graced the top of our Christmas tree, the crib mobile that used to dangle over my baby girl's outstretched hands, the wooden chest that used to hold bathtub toys – all went out to the curb. Proof of our lives, of our histories, gone.

I wiped away my tears with rubber-gloved hands.

Then my 5-year-old met me at the top of the basement stairs, smiling a sweet smile and holding out a crayon drawing, "to make you feel better, Mommy."

As I taped it to the refrigerator, I was reminded that the most precious things we have are not really things. What matters most, make that who matters most, was not lost in the flood at all.

Yay.

I am so annoyed right now that I can hardly think straight. Not that I could think straight anyway, since I am now a mother of four. I seriously think that having Jedidiah has pushed me over the edge. Not that he's a lot of trouble, exactly. He's the sweetest, most content little cutie I've just about ever seen (in addition to my girls, that is), but just the sheer magnitude of being resposible for four other people is taking its toll on me. I literally look like I've aged 10 years in the past 2 years. People keep telling me that it will reverse and I'll start looking better in a year or so, but I'm geting a little concerned. When someone says that I look like my mom now, I don't know whether to take it as a compliment (she's a beautiful woman) or an insult (she is 57). I think maybe they think I look as old as her, too.

So let's take all of this - four little kids at home, two of them trying to homeschool, which is a huge project in and of itself, a two year old who talks INCESSANTLY and who is also trying to get herself potty-trained, a three month old who is nursing (which I love, but which also takes up a good 4 hours of my day), and a house that is in perpetual need of cleaning, endless mountains of dirty clothes that tower to the roof of my laundry room, a body that feels like it's been hit by a truck - wait, maybe I should say 'filled with jelly' and THEN hit by a truck - debilitating headaches caused by post-partum hypertension, and generally a life that is pretty much off the rails right now - let's take all that, and how about, let's say, how about we add a BRAND NEW PUPPY? Doesn't that sound like a great idea?

I couldn't actually come out and say NO like I wanted to, because that would make MOMMY the bad guy, now wouldn't it? He had already told the girls about the puppy... already put a deposit down on the puppy... you get the picture. I was counting on him "reading between the lines" but apparently he is illiterate in that sense.

That's it

I asked the girls what they would do if they had a million dollars. Josie had lots of ideas at the ready: "Playdoh, tools - real ones to work with Dad, a giant trampoline... oh, and a unicorn, but they're not real." Sadie followed this list up with "A flying fairy dress. That's it."

Adelaide's Top 10 (well, 18)

-I just alweady had a good nap!
-I a big guwuhl!
-Good mornin to you!
-I want to nurse! Can I nurse?
-Can I hava snack?
-Can I hold he?
-You stinker!
-I no like you/it!
-Don't talk to me!
-I just wittle.
-I Dorofee!
-No I not. I Adewaide! Adewaide Wansing!
-You you you tired?
-Do it vewy gentiwee.
-You do it evewy time!
-Cause I do! Cause I did!
-I just alweady did!
-She just, she just hurt myself.

Funny Things

I heard my oldest child say to her sister, "Josie, I will get that from you! By the Great Horn Spoon I will!" I did not even know what this meant... as a matter of fact, I'd never even HEARD this saying before. Sadie explained to me that this was something that Pa Ingalls used to say when he was mad. I looked it up - she's right! It was "a common American oath used in the 1800s." She was right on target, but it was certainly funny to hear it coming from her!

Adelaide has learned the ever-popular game of "Guess Which Hand It's In?" except she holds "it" in plain view and then says "Guess which hand is in? Guess which hand is in?"

Josie's dialogue to herself after we talked about getting a dog (but I was in earshot, and she always talks to herself out loud... keep in mind that she is the world's biggest rambler): "Well, I will take care of it, though I've never taken care of a dog before so someone will have to teach me. I wonder what its name will be... what will I name it? I don't know. But I will walk it and feed it and brush it and play with it and it can sleep with me... but who will clean up the poop? I guess for that I will have to call for my mom." Ah hah! Just as I suspected!

Last night as I was tucking the girls in bed, after I sang to them, rubbed their backs, and said prayers, Sadie said, "You're the best Mommy in the whole world...(sigh). I wish Mommy was... Mommy." There was a pause, then Josie said, "Um...she is."

Here Comes Trouble

Jedidiah is already over two months old... and I love the cute little chubbiness he's turning into. Every morning I hold him close and nurse him and snuggle his warm fuzzy baby cuteness and I think to myself... this is the last time I'll have this kind of newborn love! This realization, of course, always brings tears to my eyes. I have to pretty much force myself to LIVE IN THE MOMENT instead of worrying about the NEXT moment. It's a problem I've dealt with my entire life.

Today I dressed him in a 3-6 month outfit (a red and black plaid flannel fleece :)for the first time and it fit perfectly, which means (gasp) that he is no longer a newborn. Then he proceeded to smile at me a dozen times... those brilliant, light-up-the-room, toothless smiles that take up his whole little face - and my heart just melts for him. Maybe it's because after three others before him, I know just how fast this time will fly by. Or maybe it's because God implanted something in my genetic make-up to force me to bond with (and be enchanted by) his every little "goo" and "booo" and "thhhppt." Whatever it is, the love I feel in my heart - in my entire being - for this little boy is somewhat overwhelming. I don't know what to do with it all! It keeps spilling over from my eyes somehow.

And that's the truth

So Sadie and Josie could stay up a little longer to play with their Polly Pocket dolls upstairs, I let Adelaide snuggle in bed with me for a while. I thought she would conk out immediately, but of course she just snuggles next to me and stays AWAKE. And awake. And awake. I pretended to be asleep because I thought she might give in and fall out, but then I felt her little hand on mine and heard her little voice right next to my ear -
Adelaide: "Mommy, are you asleep yet?"
Me: "Yes."
Adelaide: "Oh. Okay."
Then she gave up and went to sleep!

I asked Josie about the cupcakes she made with Grandma Beth on Friday night and she told me they were "eggnog cupcakes." I said, "Really?" She said, surprised that I doubted her, "YES! I tell ya what's the TRUTH, Mommy!"

One of the most surprising things about my kids is that they love to hear the Bible read. Not just Bible stories, mind you, but from the real, actual BIBLE. They actually beg me to read it to them at breakfast each morning. It's strange, I think, in this day and age, to have someone beg you to read the Bible to them. Strange, yet humbling, in a way. I love that about them. They both try to shush Adelaide, too, while I'm reading: "HUSH, ADELAIDE! You do NOT talk while Mommy is reading the BIBLE!" It's funny. This week we finished the story of Noah. As we were talking about all the people who probably were banging on the door, trying to get in the ark when the flood started, Josie said, "Well, Noah couldn't have opened the door even if he WANTED to, because GOD shut that door!" Josie is a very perceptive child. :)

Mommy Guilt

I'm feeling guilty about not doing a baby calendar for Jedidiah. For Sadie and Josie, I kept meticulous calendars about their every move for their first whole year, complete with stickers for special occasions. Adelaide got a little bit less of the royal treatment regarding calendars... hers wasn't nearly as filled in, and it didn't have stickers, either. Poor Jedidiah has no calendar at all. I just do not have the time to do it! So I'm writing this down in my blog for him - Jedidiah, you are so cute and scrumptious and your chubby little cheeks make me want to kiss them EVERYDAY. You get cuter EVERY day, and you are learning and growing right before our eyes. When you "talk" to us, saying "goo" and "doo" and "ahhh" we all just melt and we love to hear your sweet little voice (except when you're crying)! You like looking at your yellow duck, watching the bluebirds in your crib, staring at the jungle mobile, and being held by your sisters (especially Josie, at this point). You talk to Daddy the most...apparently, the two of you are kindred spirits, including your stinky baby-gas issues! You are a serious toot machine, kid! I love you so much and the fact that you don't have a calendar has NO reflection whatsoever on the amount of love I feel for you! You are my sweet sweet baby boy... and at least you have a baby book of your own. :)

In a Teapot?

The kids were in a hurry to get to Grammie's house the other day. On the highway, there were different traffic patterns because of road construction. Different ANYthing is noticed by my kids, so of course they assumed it was a totally different road. Since they KNOW the way to Grammie's, Sadie asked me three or four times why I was going this way. I said, "Because I'm going to Grammie's!" She said, "Well, don't you know the right way?" I said, "Of course I know the right way to go." She said, "Well, then, why are you going THIS way?"

Adelaide: "Does God have a cane?"

Today Adelaide was playing with her Little People Toys. Keep in mind that we have a Little People Nativity set. This is what I overheard: "Hey! I am Tinkerbell! See dese wings? Now get outta da way. Here comes Baby Jesus in a teapot!"

For Christmas, I got the girls a beautiful star shaped nightlite with cutouts in it to hang from their ceiling. Every night, one of them gets to turn on their "starlight." Last night, Josie said, "Hey! It really is our star LIGHT. Star Light, star bright, first star I see tonight, because it IS the first star I see tonight!"

Trouble

This morning when Grandpa Roy left our house, he said, "See ya later, alligator" to Josie. She responded, "See YOU later, Grampalator!"

Yesterday, I was trying to teach Adelaide The Sharing Song. "It's mine but you can have some, with you I'd like to share it, cause if I share it with you... you'll have some too!" After we finished singing it, she looked at me and said very seriously, "Hey... can you teach Josie that song?"

Sadie was singing the song Trouble by Ray LaMontagne... "Trouble...trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble..." When Grammie interrupted and asked how long trouble had been dogging her soul, Sadie replied, "Since the day I was born!"

Sadie has been practicing Checkers over the past couple of months. She likes playing with Grammie (she always wins) and with me (she usually wins) but the other night she played THREE games with Jesse and he beat her every time. He was trying to teach her the ins and outs of the game and some tricks to winning, but she wasn't happy to lose! However, last night they played and SHE WON! She was so excited (and proud that she'd beaten an actual opponent) that she came running to find me and said, "I beat the KING OF CHECKERS! That makes me the QUEEN OF CHECKERS! See? I'm going to sit in my royal seat right now!"

Josie was holding Jedidiah after his bath (he LOVES his bath) and he turned his head and looked RIGHT into her eyes and said, "Goo!" She was beyond thrilled, and said, "He talked to me! He really talked to me! Hooray! I think he said 'Jo.'"

Three Little Ladies and One Little Man

Two and Two

Yesterday morning I caught Adelaide red-handed in the laundry room with an open bag full of those Christmas peppermint nougat things (like my earrings)...minus one, which was shoved in her in her slobbery mouth. Before I said ANYthing at all to her, she blurted out, mouth full: "I didn't mess with the mints, Mommy! I DIDN'T!"

Then, last night, she found a huge bag full of snacks that I bought to go in the nursery at church. She said, "What what what are dose?" When I told her they were for church, she got all excited and yelled, "We are going to church! We are going to church!" Josie said, "No we are not. They are for SUNDAY." Adelaide looked at me and said, "I guess we will just haf to go widout HER."

Our New Year... much like the old!

We continued our annual New Year's Eve tradition by going to bed at 10:00pm last night. Exciting! Josie and Adelaide and Jedidiah and I went to eat at Bob Evans and then to see Tangled at the movies on Thursday night, so that was as much fun as we could handle. We had to turn in early on New Year's!

Sadie got to go on a big adventure right after Christmas and she's still gone... a trip to NC with Grammie and Grampie Don ALL BY HERSELF. We've been missing her terribly - it was heartbreaking when she left... we waved and waved until she was out of sight and I just had an awful empty feeling in my heart as they pulled away! It's true what they say about having children and having your heart forever walk around outside your body, isn't it? She's having a good time, though... she got to spend the night with Cameron and Caleb and play up there all day, she has Great Grandma's AND Grammie's attention all to herself, and she's been taken out for pizza, ice cream, AND shopping with Mamaw and Papaw. She did call me and leave a sad message yesterday: "Hey Mommy. I just wanted to talk to someone from my family. Great Grandma Genevieve says I can't talk long because it costs too much but I wanted to leave a message because I miss you A LOT. Okay, bye."

This morning Josie sang this sweet little song to her baby brother:
"Hush little baby, you're safe as can be... close your eyes and snore happily!"

Giving Adelaide a plate of turkey bacon for breakfast, I said, "Can you go share this with Josie?" She answered, "NO!" I said, "Why not?" She answered, "Because I'm MEAN!" Well, at least she's honest.

Goodbye, 2010

Well, I guess this will be my last post for this year - and what a year it was. I became the stay-at-home mother of FOUR small children, and the homeschooling mother of two. Wow. I never thought I'd hear myself say THOSE words. It's all very unbelievable... if it wasn't happening to me at this moment (ie: crying from a crib, raspberries mushed into the couch, Dinosaur Train on the TV) I wouldn't have believed it. Jedidiah is such a joy... I love watching him look at the world with his big dark blue eyes; I love watching Sadie hold him and burp him, to hear her talk sweet baby talk to him; I love watching Josie gaze at him with such love and hearing her call him her "Boy"; I love watching Adelaide get in his little face to smooch him and say "Hey baby brudder!" It's such a blessing to have 3 little mommies/big sisters around. Even though he is NOT following my schedule, I still love him and his adorable baby sweetness. Hopefully my schedule will prevail in the new year!

All I can really say is thank you to God for the blessings we've had this year, and for the four little ones He has entrusted to me and Jesse. Please help us be the parents we need to be in the coming year.

Christmasy

We had a good, if hectic, Christmas here, although we really missed our family and friends in NC. It was nice to be in Ohio for once so we could do the Christmas Eve service at church (Jedidiah's first debut in public), Christmas Day at Beth and Roy's, and the day after Christmas party with all of Jesse's family at Aunt Cindy's. The kids had a good time with all their cousins, and there was LOTS of present opening to do, even though we all said we were going to cut back this year.


Josie helped Adelaide make a Nativity wreath that came from her Sunday School class. There was a girl angel and a boy angel on it. I asked Josie what their names were, and she replied, "Well, the boy one's name is Harold." I should've known.

Adelaide made up a new song to go along with her Christmas favorites. While she loves Rudolph, Jingle Bells (she loves to yell HEY! at the end), and Away in a Manger, she likes to sing her own little ditty called "Jingle Poop." Yes, it's just like it sounds. She also made up one called "I don't like Christmas lights," which she and her sisters sang when they were pretty much "Christmas-lighted out" by the end of the season.

Sadie wrote a note to Santa so he would know the water and carrots were for Rudolph and not for him... I guess she didn't want to insult him :) and he brought Sadie a Magic Crystal Growing Garden, Josie a "Cook it in a Cup" set, and Adelaide a WHOLE SET of Wizard of Oz dolls! The gifts were all a big hit.

Adelaide and Josie went over to our neighbors' house the other night to play. When I picked Adelaide up (Josie spent the night), Joy (the mom) told me that Adelaide had picked up a little book and sat down to read it, saying, "Dis is my Bible." Cute!

I was teasing Josie about marrying Jack someday, so I could have his mom and dad as in-laws. Josie said, "Well, that's when out-laws become in-laws." And that, my friends, is the last of the Christmas spirit in our house! :)

Ha ha!

Tonight we were studying the parts of a plant for Sadie's Science class. One of the questions regarding roots and how they hold trees in the ground was, "What do roots protect trees from?" Her answer, "Well, wind, mainly. Or sometimes Grandpa driving over them in his car."

Grammie Gail was saying the Lord's Prayer for Adelaide the other day when Josie overheard the beginning: "The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want...." Josie, with a shocked look on her face, said, "You don't want the LORD???"

Sadie has had an ongoing "puppy love crush" on Ian, our friends' little boy (they live in Texas). When they came up to visit this past summer, he asked Sadie if she thought they might get married one day. Well, that did it for her! She thinks he's the greatest. They were here last week, and after sitting with him and his family at church on Sunday, Sadie and Josie both talked to him after Jesse and I talked with his mom. Josie, who lost her VERY FIRST TOOTH last week (lower right one) when she spent the night with Grammie and was eating a peppermint stick, told Ian about it. She was holding said tooth as she talked on the phone. Suddenly, she dropped it down between the couch cushions. She said to Ian, "Hey, I lost my tooth." He said, "I know, you already told me that." She said, "No... I mean I LOST it!" As they were hanging up, Sadie said to him, "Bye, CUTIEPANTS!"

Adelaide, who always likes to ask, "What you makin?" when I'm in the kitchen, always tells me when I answer (no matter what the answer is), "I no like that!" The other day, when she informed me that she 'no liked' her pancake, her chicken sausage, or her fruit, I said to her, "Well, you just don't like anything." She said, offended, "Uh-huh! I like Caroline and God!"

Glad You're Here

After Jedidiah's first doctor appointment (just 2 days after checking out from the hospital) we went to Beth's house because I missed the girls so much (and Jesse didn't want to leave me home alone while he finished working). When we came into view of the house, I spotted Josie, all bundled up in her coat and hat, waiting on us outside in the cold. It was so sweet of her to brave the cold... just because she couldn't wait to see her baby brother! Sadie and Adelaide, not quite as brave, ran out when they found out we'd pulled in. Not quite as committed as Josie!

Heard after bringing him home, from both Josie and Sadie: "Can I hold him now? Now? How bout now? NOW? It's my turn! Is he EVER going to be done eating!?" And from Adelaide: "I want to hold he! That my baby brudder." And my all time favorite, whispered in secret to her baby brother as she stared at him while I held him on the couch at Grandma Beth's house, two days after we got out of the hospital: "I glad you here." The sweetest thing I think I've ever heard.

Sadie was a very big helper during and right after my hospital stay. Josie was too, but Sadie seemed to take the biggest sister lead in stride, holding the baby, getting drinks for me, helping Grandma with chores, taking care of Adelaide, etc, etc. I am so blessed to have 3 little mommies who want to take care of "their baby!"

Jedidiah's Birth Story

Last week, I thought I had it all together! I had 14 days left until we were having the baby. I had help to come over and help clean the house (Dawn from D6 and her three daughters did a lot of the stuff that I couldn’t!), I had my to-do list whittled down, and I had started packing. I was prepared! Well, this week I started feeling somewhat icky. I can’t really explain why… I just felt bad. But that’s par for the course, right? Can’t sleep, can’t bend over, can’t feel my hands, feet swollen, etc. etc.

Tuesday we finished the REST of my to-do list. I marked off “clean oven” and felt like I had accomplished something! Jesse steamed the carpets in the hallway, the baby’s room, and the schoolroom. I even made a last minute trip to the grocery store (even though I didn’t know THEN that it was last minute). Wednesday morning my mom came over to watch the girls so Jesse and I could go to my last doctor appointment/ultrasound to schedule my c-section. I was fully planning to schedule for the following Monday (the 22nd) instead of what we had talked about earlier (the 29th) because I didn’t want to suddenly go into labor and get Dr. Joe Schmoe instead of MY wonderful doctor that I felt completely comfortable with. I was really feeling iffy – like the baby was dropping more and more every time I took a step, and like there was no way I’d make it two more weeks until the 29th. Then, Jesse ended up having to go downtown for work and he couldn’t come with me so I ended up at the doctor’s by myself. No big deal, especially since he’d called and said, “I trust your judgment… schedule it for whenever you want and I’ll support you.” Nice! I even stopped by Lowe’s first to get a lightbulb for Josie’s school desk lamp and some Barkeeper’s Friend to clean my kitchen sink with, and I talked to 5 or 6 people who I used to work with. So, I wasn’t panicked at all when I got to the doctor’s office. That is, until I went into the little ultrasound room. Everything looked okay to me… but she sent me back to the waiting room… then called me BACK to the ultrasound room again. Then sent me back to the waiting room… then called me BACK to the ultrasound room AGAIN. At this point, I began to freak out thinking something had to be wrong with the baby. I texted Jesse – I THINK SOMETHING IS WRONG THEY CALLED ME BACK TO THE ULTRASOUND ROOM THREE DIFFERENT TIMES I AM ABOUT TO FREAK OUT – he replied – BEEN KICKING? WHAT THE HECK IS GUERRIERI SAYING? – I said – WAITING FOR HIM RIGHT NOW HASN’T BEEN IN YET – he said – I’M SURE HE’S FINE RELAX. KEEP ME POSTED. – and it was at this point that Dr. Guerrieri came into the exam room and appeared to be all business, which I’ve never seen before! He’s always giving me a hug, calling me the world’s most perfect woman, stuff like that. So the all business thing freaked me out even more. He said, “Here’s the deal. I don’t know if your body is leaking amniotic fluid or if your placenta has stopped producing it, but you do not have enough. You should have quite a bit at this point in the pregnancy and you have hardly any. So I think we should do this sooner rather than later.” I said, “I was planning on scheduling today anyway. I was thinking Monday. Would Monday work?” and he said, “I was thinking today or tomorrow.” Yikes. That threw me for a loop. I asked what he thought… should I do it today or tomorrow, and he said if I could get everything together, like babysitters etc., that he thought I should do it TODAY if at all possible. So I said okay, I will work something out, and he rushed out to call the hospital and set me up right then. Jesse, who had called me right before that (tired of waiting for me to text him) was already on the phone, so I filled him in. I felt a little sick at that moment… I mean, I went in thinking I had 5 more days to mentally prepare myself and get everything ready at home and set up for the girls’ babysitting and stuff, and suddenly I’ve been told it’s going to happen TODAY. He came back in and told me to be at the hospital at 3:30, my surgery was scheduled for 5:00pm. Then he assured me that it would definitely be him doing the surgery and not someone else… “You’re stuck with me, “ he said. Then I went to the car, got in, and began to have pretty much what I would call a full-blown anxiety attack.

I called my mom at home, but Jesse had gotten to her first…she already knew what was happening. So then I called Angela, who miraculously answered the phone because she was on a field trip. That made me feel better. Then I called Daddy, Amanda, Melissa, and Julie from my Bible Study Group. Everyone tried to reassure me, but I was still trying hard not to cry! I needed to hold it together so Sadie and Josie and Adelaide wouldn’t be worried about me. When I got home, I sat them down in the family room and told them what was going on. They were mainly excited… you could tell Sadie was a little bit nervous, though. Adelaide had no idea what was going on… she just said, “Mommy you goin to hospital? You get bruver?” Josie was all smiles, though. I think she’s been the most excited the whole time. Then I got busy finishing packing my bag, sorting one more load of laundry, emailing Sadie’s and Josie’s teachers, calling Dawn from D6, cleaning the kitchen sink, and then snuggling on my bed with the girls until Jesse got there to pick me up. It’s always a scary feeling when you think there’s a chance that you might not ever see your kids again. I always think that before I go in for surgery… that there’s a chance, no matter how small, that I might die during surgery and they will have to face life without me. That’s scary for me to think about. I informed my mom (much to her dismay) that she was in charge of telling them how much I loved them if anything were to happen, and that there were letters to each of them in their baby books from me, and that she would have to sort out all the scrapbooks for them. She can’t STAND it when I say things like that, but hey, it has to be said.

Then Jesse came home, changed clothes, and got his stuff together, packed the car, and off we went. I think I’ll always remember the three of them hugging me and kissing me and running through the yard to climb up on the big rock, waving, waving, waving… until we rounded the corner and were out of sight. My three little beautiful stair-step girls. Sometimes you wish you could just freeze time and keep them JUST LIKE THAT. That was one of those ‘mental picture’ moments you hear about so much. You never really think about how much you love someone until there’s a chance you might not see them again, you know? I know I’m morbid, but that’s just how it is.

It was a cool, overcast day, and I was wearing my dark gray pants that had just finished in the dryer (well, ALMOST finished. Mama put them in, but they were still a little wet and we ended up putting them in the microwave… so I was pantless right up until we walked out the door of the house), a white t-shirt, and my blue and white Nikes we got at the outlet in Florida. I was holding on to my pillow and my boppy while Jesse drove and I recounted the story of the morning dr. visit to him. He didn’t seem to be nervous at all which is both calming to me and annoying to me at the same time!

Once we parked and got out of the car, I started having some serious cramping pains while we were walking through the parking lot. I remember thinking that it was probably a good thing that we went ahead and came to the hospital, since I didn’t think I would make it through the weekend without going into labor at that point anyway. When we waddled into the lobby, the team of receptionists all pointed us to the 3rd floor, all oohing and ahhing and saying good luck and how exciting that we were getting a baby today! We headed upstairs, and it was all very surreal… it didn’t seem possible that we were actually in the ACTUAL elevator, going up to the ACTUAL operating room. I guess it’s because it hit us all of a sudden. I really didn’t even have much time to get nervous. We arrived around 3:30pm, and they ushered us straight into Labor and Delivery Room 12 on the 3rd floor of the hospital/luxury hotel suite. Seriously. The brand new hospital has all wood floors, granite countertops, beautiful tilework, etc. It’s too fancy to be a hospital. The ladies came in and started on our paperwork, and I switched over into a fabulous hospital gown and sat down in the rocking chair to start signing off on the papers that said I wouldn’t sue them if I happened to die while in surgery. Jesse made himself busy unpacking and moving things around and being generally unable to keep still (maybe he WAS a little nervous after all). Then once all that was finished, a nice nurse named Anita came in to do my IV and started pumping me FULL of fluid. I remember it was icy cold and they put a pressure cuff on it to squeeze it harder to get me even FULLER of fluid faster! My nose and fingers started swelling up even more almost immediately! Anita assured me that she’d be with me the WHOLE time, which made me feel better. Then another nurse came in to put in my catheter, which was pretty much pure torture. Jesse said it was really hard to watch, but it was harder to stay there on the bed while she did it without jumping up, smacking her, and running away! When she was finished, I started to panic a bit and Jesse came over and held my hand and prayed for me and for the baby’s safe delivery. That made me feel better. Next, the two anesthetists came in (Dr. Whitaker and her assistant Cathleen) and talked to me and examined my x-rays. With my history of spinal headaches, they wanted to be extra careful to make sure they did everything possible to get the needle in the right spot the first time with little or no trauma, including using the smallest needle that they had. I felt pretty confident about it, which was a good thing, because right after that, it was suddenly 5pm and they escorted me across the hall to the sterile operating hallway. Jesse finished putting on his scrubs (he joked that he didn’t need a hat since he had no hair) and awaited them calling him into the O.R.
I went in and they helped me up onto the table. I had to sit leaning forward with my legs hanging off the side of the table. Anita helped push my head down onto my chest, and I had to curve my spine so they could find the right spot to put the needle in. It took a pretty long time (I remember looking at the clock and seeing it say 5:04) but they took their time and the needle went in without a hitch (with one of my surgeries – Sadie’s, I think, they had to move the needle all around to find the space and it made a terrible crunching noise). Then I started going numb and they laid me back on the table and strapped me down. Then they put up the drape and Dr. Guerrieri made his appearance (I was so glad to see him!) They checked to make sure I was all the way numb, and then Jesse came in with his video camera and
started to record! Next thing I knew, I was hearing a baby cry! And I was so happy and relieved to hear his little voice! So I started crying too, and the tears kept running into my ears and Jesse had to wipe them out. Jesse said that he started peeing as soon as they took him out, hehee. They showed him to me, and he was so teeny and cute! They said he was 7 lbs, 7 oz, and 20 inches long. I was a bit overwhelmed, and felt both joy and sadness and fear and thankfulness and a hundred other things all at the same time as they put Humpty Dumpty back together and stitched me all back up. I told the doctor to suck some of the fat out while he was down there! Everything after that is kind of a blur for me. I remember them putting the baby right by my head so I could see him close up, and then I remember them switching me to my bed from the operating table (always a scary move!). After that, I don't remember much except marveling over how cute and small he was and ITCHING. The Duramorph they put in my spinal block made me itch insanely for hours and hours. I think the pain would've been better than the itching! Grammie Gail and Grampie Don came to see us first... Grampie was touched - he kept saying, "This is a glorious night!" Then Grandma and Grandpa came, shortly follwed by Aunt Lydia and all three of the big sisters (proudly wearing their Big Sister medals on their shirts). They were SO EXCITED to meet the baby. I'll never forget Josie's face when she walked into the room, looking for him everywhere, and then she laid eyes on him and was totally smitten! Adelaide held him first, but she wasn't all that impressed. She said, "Where my baby bruver?" then when she held him for a few seconds and kind of pushed him away and said, "I all done." She also kept calling HIM the big sister, which was kind of funny. Sadie and Josie, however, pretty much fought over who would GET to hold him. They were so
happy to see him, and it was just precious to see them together. Jesse and I spent the next ENTIRE day trying to figure out his name...It was a toss up between my favorites, Jedidiah and Sawyer, and his favorite, Memphis. Needless to say, I finally got my own way for once, and Jedidiah was aptly named: "Friend of God." I hope he'll grow into his name! :)

Don't Need Anything

I've got gardens growing, got quiet days
clothes on my back, food on my plate
got friends to help me if I call for them
don't need anything I don't have

got eyes to see this beautiful land
feet to take me where I want to stand
if there's work to be done, I've got these two strong hands
I don't need anything I don't have
I don't need anything I don't have

some years the rains don't come
some years floods clear out the plains
but if those waters wash this town away
I would still have enough if they were with me

I've got a roof overhead, stars if I choose
but I've no need to fly, I've got no itch to move
got almost nothing, but I understand
that I don't need anything that I don't have
I don't need anything that I don't have

Violins

I'm ready to get this baby out of me. I don't know that I'm ready for the wild (sleepless) ride of having a newborn, but I do know that my body is ready to be done with being pregnant! Right now, I can't feel the tips of any of my fingers, my hands are swollen so much that my fingers look like Vienna sausages, my right arm is numb, I have a shooting pain in my right hip, I have pregnant nose, my face is broken out, I'm congested, I snore like a freight train, my hair looks like steel wool, I can't wear socks, and all my bras are too small. I can't bend over, get up out of the floor (or a chair, for that matter), or go for over an hour without having to pee. When I wake up in the morning I have to use one hand to bend the wrist of my other hand because my hands are so stiff! I cry at the drop of a hat, and I wheeze when I breathe. I can't sleep, even though I'm SO TIRED. I can't get comfortable, since there's a giant bowling ball growing in the vicinity of my stomach. I'm recording this for posterity so that this kid can see what he put me through at the end! Yet I'll love him anyway! Also because Jesse announced during prayer requests at church this morning that I need a violin player to follow me around. :)

Fantastic

My mom went to church with us today and on the way home (she rode with the kids and me in the van while Jesse stayed late for a meeting) she sang the girls a song she'd made up. It went like this: "Over the river and through the woods, to Bob Evans we go, to pick up the food that I didn't cook to eat for early Thanksgiving lunch, oh!" It was really a terrible song and it didn't fit with the tune very well either, obviously. Well, considering that everything that Grammie does is usually hilarious to the girls, you can imagine her dismay when she stopped singing and nobody said a WORD. Seriously. You could practically hear crickets chirping in the car. I was enjoying the long moments of silence when my mom said, "Well? WELL? Did anyone like my song?" More silence.

Then Josie deadpanned, "It was FAN-tastic."

What's My Name?

Sadie confided to me the other day that sometimes, when I think she's asleep, she will sneak out of bed, get a book, and "Read by fishlamp light." She's just a regular little old Abraham Lincoln. :)

At dinner a few nights ago, Jesse read to us from a devotional book about pride and how it's a bad thing. The story that went along with the Bible example was one about a little boy who kept bragging to his friend that his dad was better than his friend's dad. Jesse mentioned that we should not brag and try to make others feel bad. Josie, to prove that she got his point, piped up, "Daddy, well, I KNOW that you are not the best Daddy." I almost fell out of my chair laughing!

Adelaide came into the living room today and sang, "Over de wainbow... up high!" then she said, "I'm Widzer of Oz. What's my name?" I said, "Adelaide." She said, "NO!!! I'm Widzer of Oz... what's my name... what's my name? Oh! I DOROFEE!"

"I not Silly. I just Adewaide."

Some cute sayings by Miss Adelaide:

-I talk to Gweat Gwandma Genvedee!
-I want haircut!
-This big mess! In here!
-I not talking to you!
-No more bonking on that head!
-I wan watch Beauty and Beask!
-There's a monster in my in my in my room!
-I no like you!
-I get in baftub!
-No talk to me!

Cryin'

I'm having some serious hormonal issues. I don't know if it's because we didn't get to go to NC last week like we were supposed to or because I'm so hugely pregnant, or what, but it's kind of ridiculous. For instance, today I started crying when I was trying to get them ready for naps. I just gave Sadie a hug and suddenly realized how big she is now. I actually had flashbacks of when she was a little baby! Time is going by too fast. Same thing happened with Josie when I went in to tuck her in for her nap. I sang her the little song I made up... Please stay little, just a little while longer...don't grow up too fast... Please stay little, just a little while longer... I want these moments to last. Sigh. I can't believe how fast the time is going by. Even Adelaide, my baby girl, is getting huge now. Speaking in complete (and numerous) sentences all the time... wanting to do everything herself. She really needs a haircut but I'm afraid to cut it because I KNOW she'll look so much older! I don't think I can take it!

On top of this, I've been thinking about the fact that this is the last time I'll be pregnant. And while I've suffered LOTS of morning sickness, bachaches, terrible carpal tunnel, and numerous other maladies, the payoff is always huge! I will miss the feeling of life growing inside me, and knowing that God is knitting a baby together in my womb. I will miss the feeling of anticipation, and the counting down the days, and the waiting to meet the brand new little person that's going to come out! I will miss the punching and the kicking and the watching my giant belly move around like a big rolling earthquake, the changes that happen daily... though not the big feet and the "pregnant nose." And definitely not the numb hands and aching arms!

While in some ways I am most definitely ready to have baby number 4 (and final) and get on with life and figure out our routines and get things settled and on an even keel - as much as you can have that with 4 little kids - I am still wondering if I will have a bit of a let down, you know, like after your wedding is over? You're always happy and glad it's over with, but there's sort of a letdown too, since the "big event" is over and you're moving on to life as usual.

It's Fall!

Last week we went to the Little Red Schoolhouse for an "It's Fall!" class. Adelaide had a super good time. Sadie and Josie did too, but this was Adelaide's first real trip when she was actually part of the class. We did leaf rubbings with crayons of all different kinds of leaves, played with fall puzzles and puppets, listened to a story about what the animals do in autumn, checked out the hissing cockroaches, butterflies, and tarantulas that they have in cages, and then we went on a nature hike on the trail with our tour guide and the rest of the class. Out there we got to see milkweed, burrs, and all kinds of seedpods in action! It was fun to see the girls kicking up all the leaves (we didn't have any in our yard yet) and interacting with nature. My only problem was trying to climb the giant three story outdoor staircase covered with wet leaves... I didn't think that top-heavy me would be able to make it to the top and back down the hill on the other side without falling and killing myself! They liked looking for worms and grubs and other bugs underneath the rocks and throwing sticks and leaves off the bridge into the creek. They collected their own leaves, too, and their favorites seemed to be these GIGANTIC poplar (I think) leaves that used as their 'fans' on the way home. The coolest part that we learned about was that leaves aren't naturally green in color. Green is just the chlorophyll that they make all spring and summer for food. The green covers up the leaf's natural color, which only comes out in the fall when they leaf stops making its own food! It's fun to see them enjoying nature and the wonder of God's creations!

Beginning of F A L L

Since we watched The Wizard of Oz last year, the girls incorporate the ideas from the movie (and the book) into their every day lives. At breakfast the other morning, Josie cracked me up with her spot-on impersonation of the Mayor of Munchkin City... "Follow the yellow brick road!" She can sound EXACTLY like him! Sadie likes to sound more like the flutey voice of the GIRL munchkin, while Adelaide sings in a growly voice: "Sing it low, sing it low. Sing it LOW!"

In our homeschool co-op, Sadie is taking a class called Engineering Unwrapped. She loves learning how things work and how things are made, so this class is right up her alley. Last week she came running into the lunchroom to show me some Necco Wafers that she had learned all about in class that day. She said, "Mommy, hey, look. These are old-timey candies like from when Grammie was a little girl. They're called "long-necks."

Tonight Sadie and Josie had an interesting science lesson out in the garage as they helped Jesse clean a rainbow trout. They looked at all the disgusting innards and tried to figure out what they were (bleck). When they came in, Sadie talked to Papaw (my daddy) on the phone. She said, "We've been outside dressing a fish... or UNdressing, I guess I should say."

Yesterday, Adelaide broke a big bottle of cooking wine all over my kitchen floor. It was a huge mess for me to try to bend over (which is NOT easy these days!) and clean up AND it left me with a two year old who smelled like a wino for the rest of the afternoon. I seriously was concerned that if we went anywhere we might run into a policeman who would think I was liquoring up my kid! Honestly, the only way my kitchen floor seems to get mopped these days is if one of the girls accidentally spills her WATER on it and I have to wipe it up. Seriously. I spread it around as much as possible, so my floor gets a two foot radius of 'clean.' I'm busy and pregnant...what can I say?

Last week Sadie spent her own money at a garage sale for a Dora the Explorer pogo stick. She constantly calls it a "pongo" stick, which drives me nuts. No matter how many times I tell her it's POGO, she always switches back to PONGO. Oh well. It's fun watching her try to conquer it, but it definitely calls for a helmet.

On Sunday after church, we went to the pumpkin patch to get our pumpkins for jack-o-lanterns. The kids were super disappointed that it was too muddy to go through the corn maze and climb the hay bale mountain, but we had a good old time scooping out pumpkin goop and getting our scary faces carved!

My kids would subsist on nothing but pinto beans and cornbread if I'd let them. Josie single-handedly finished off half a dozen corn muffins at lunch the other day. As a matter of fact, I think it was the same day she ate half a loaf of pumpkin bread that Melissa brought over for us. She called Melissa to tell her how great of a baker she is... and (ulterior motive) to ask her to bring over some more!

Last week we went to the little amateur theater a couple of towns over to see two old-fashioned melodramas called "The Farmer's Daughter" and "Saved by the Serendipity Circus." The girls loved the fact that they could clap and cheer for the white-hatted hero and (even better) that they could boo and hiss for the villain!

And, last but not least, my new favorite joke: I told my psychiatrist I was having dreams that I was a teepee, then a wigwam...a teepee, then a wigwam...a teepee, then a wigwam. He said, "You're too tense."

8 1/2

Last night Josie said to me, "Mommy, Daddy is funner than you are. You are always tired and you don't play with us." This made me feel, as you can imagine, TERRIBLE. Then I realized, wait a minute... I have been pregnant and/or nursing for their entire lives! For the past 6 1/2 years, my body has pretty much never had a break. I'm giving it 2 more years, tops, and then I'm going to be energetic and fun, dang it!