Park It

So, today we went to the park with Grammie, Becky, James, and Tea. We had a picnic, and the kids had a great time scavenging Sunchips from all adults present. Josie practiced standing up by herself and stuffing her face full of food at the same time. Sadie, James, and Tea ran around like crazy people with sticks... poking trash cans, hunting bees, feeding ducks, and going "clippety-clop" over the bridge.

My favorite part was when we moved over to the playground. Josie had a good old time swinging in the baby swing, and Sadie decided to climb the little round stairs up to the slide platform. These stairs are kind of scary looking - not very sturdy. She didn't know I was behind her, but as she climbed up, very slowly, I heard her talking to herself... "PULL! myself up." (Next step) "PULL! myself up." (Next step) "PULL! myself up." When she got to the top, she stopped, surveyed her situation, and muttered, "Hmm. This is very scary for me."

This is the elusive "Fairy Dogmother."

And this is the new and improved "Corn Queen Josephine."

The Big One

Well, today was the big day. I am - gasp - now Thirty. The big 3-0. Funny, I don't feel any older....

It was relatively painless. Actually, it was somewhat enjoyable! Jesse let me sleep in, I got $ for a de-stressing massage from my mama, beautiful flowers from Melanie, $ from my Daddy so I can afford to come home!, a great card from Melissa along with an offer of babysitting :), a Lowe's gift card, hot fudge cake, great jeans, a fabulos-o red silk diaper bag, a card organizer, and (YAY!) a gift certificate to a real, live, SPA for whatever I want! I have been browsing my Menu of Services for the past two hours. Finally, I can get a haircut somewhere other than Great Clips. LOL

Today, Jesse and I went to work on the house after church while the grandparents took the kids home with them (another birthday present). When I walked in, lo and behold, what did I see before me but my VERY OWN CHAISE LOUNGE! The very one I have always wanted! Jesse totally surprised me with it. I can't remember the last time I was that suprised... it was great.

All in all, a good time was had by all (but mainly by ME).

Sweet Dreams

Today, I decided to stop being such a stickler for naptime and bedtime. They are growing up so fast, and I just want to hold on to them the way they are right now. I've decided to cherish it... for the moment, anyway. So, instead of putting Josie down for her nap this afternoon, I rocked and snuggled her for an hour. She put her blanket on her head, snuggled down into my chest, and kept popping back up to look at me and grin every five minutes. She also whispered, "Da, da, duh, duh, duh," and "Ma-mah!" Not much sleeping was done, but it certainly was some great quality time. Especially when she reached up, gently touched my cheek, looked into my eyes, and then stuck her finger right up my nose. :)

In keeping with my new persona, I let Sadie stay up until 9, and she snuggled with me in MY bed and we read books and talked. She also said her prayers with me... she's so funny - after she thanked God for Papaw and Mamaw, she thanked Him again for Rudy the dog, and also for "Little Rudy." I can only hope that she's always as sweet as she is right now. She just comes out with these SWEET things, like, "I'm so glad you're here, Mommy," or "I love you so much!" or "I'm so happy to see you!" We also sang Josie's bedtime song. Sadie (totally surprising me) added her own little echo to the song... I sang a line, then she repeated it after me, for the whole song. It was so cute, but I guess you had to be there. I'm glad I was.

"Who is Coming to the Zoo?"

Josie kissed me last night, for the first time!!! She's been blowing kisses for a while, but last night while I was rocking her, she leaned in, put her little lips right on mine, and said, "M-wah!" It was the best! Coincidentally, last night was also the first night she's ever gone to bed without her "bedtime bottle." Sigh. My little baby is growing up.

Speaking of babies growing up, Sadie has been quoting every book she has ever read. Yesterday, she said, "Spin new webs! said Spider... I will line the crib with eider," which is a line from "Who is Coming to Our House?" a book about Jesus being born in the manger. Jesse laughed and said, "Guess when I learned that word (eider)? About 2 hours ago when I read that book to her!" It's funny that she already knows it.

Today, we went to the zoo with Aunt Becky, Aunt Cindy, Uncle Darryl, James, and Teagan. Favorites were the seals, the elephants, the camels, and of course, the monkeys. It was lots of fun... the kids had a great time, up until naptime. Then, it was not so much fun! For me, anyway :)

It's only 9:30 and I'm going to bed. As you can see, the march continues onward toward the big 3-0.

Heads Up

Today, I told the girls they could get as dirty as they wanted. They headed to the sandbox. Josie dove in headfirst, and sat down inside it. Sadie dumped sand on her head. Again. They had a good old time, and then we went in to have a bath. As we were getting undressed for baths, Sadie's shirt got stuck on top of her head, so it looked like she had a little shepherd's robe/headwrap on. She said, "Hey! I look like Jesus!" Speaking of hats, we went to supper at a little fast food place that gives out those old fashioned paper sailor hats to kids. I put one on Josie's head, and I'm telling you... she looked like a poster child for a 1930's ad campaign. The child is so stinkin' cute. She got 2 molars... did I already write that? I'm losing it, you know. I really can't remember what I write and what I THINK half the time. It's getting scary! Especially since I found my first gray hair this week.... Aack!

Heehee

One of my new favorite jokes...

Her wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing could dampen her excitement -- not even her parents' nasty divorce. Her mother had found the PERFECT dress to wear and would be the best dressed mother-of-the-bride ever!

A week later, she was horrified to learn that her father's new young wife had bought the exact same dress! She asked the new wife to exchange it, but she refused. "Absolutely not. I look like a million bucks in this dress, and I'm wearing it," she replied.

The bride-to-be told her mother who graciously said, "Never mind sweetheart, I'll get another dress. After all, it's your special day."

A few days later, they went shopping and did find another gorgeous dress. When they stopped for lunch, she asked her mother, "Aren't you going to return the other dress? You really don't have another occasion where you could wear it."

Her mother just smiled and replied, "Of course I do, dear. I'm wearing it to the rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding. "

Turkey in the Sand

Josie has started wagging her head back and forth, just to be cute. It's not exactly nodding, not exactly shaking. I guess it's kind of a miniature "Stevie Wonder" move. Whatever it is, she knows it's funny, so she's doing it all the time now.

Today when I told Sadie it was time for lunch, she yelled, "But I already just ate!" When I insisted that it was lunchtime, she finally gave in and said, "Okay, Mommy. Well, I guess I can eat just a little bit of food." Then her grandpa asked if she wanted to go to Walmart with him and she said no. A little while later, when we were playing outside, he came out to leave. She said, "Bye, Grandpa!" Then, as he pulled out the driveway, she put her hands on her hips and said, "But I want to go to Walmart with Grandpa! Come back, Grandpa! Come back!" So, I called him and told him... and of course, he came back to get her.

While I was putting her shoes on, she said, "I love Grandpa. I love Papaw and Mamaw and Rudy (their dog) too. But they're at their house." It makes me sad and happy at the same time, just to know that she thinks about them.

When I strapped her into her carseat, we found out that she had ulterior motives... she informed us that she expected an Icee while she was at Walmart.

Now, I must go and undo the damage that Sadie wreaked on Josie in the sandbox. She poured a whole bucket on Josie's head while I wasn't looking! Josie thought it was funny... but I didn't!

Just thinkin'

This morning when we were getting ready for church, Sadie looked at me and said, "You're so pretty, Mommy!" This brought tears to my eyes and also made me think. The responsibility thing again. It's an unbelievable responsibility I have... to live up to anything remotely resembling what these girls deserve as a role model. I'm trying hard, but today after church, Sadie said, "Oh, crap." Sheesh. I wonder who she got that from. It could be worse, I guess, but still. That's not something you want your 2 year old spouting off.

Josie is currently upstairs attempting to take a nap. Well, actually, she is yelling something that sounds like high-pitched barking. And bouncing up and down in her crib. And throwing stuffed animals (I can hear all this through the monitor). I just put her down for a 2nd nap because they've both been fighting a cold, and there is some measure of crankiness in the house (as opposed to the normal Large measure that I myself bring). I was rocking her a little while ago, and she decided that her new favorite thing to do is grab the lace curtains and look at me through them. She smushes her little face right up against them, leans in close to my face, and then laughs her head off. She is so stinking cute that it's scary.

I miss home. It's been 2 months now since I've been there, and I'm beginning to learn that that's my limit. I miss my daddy. I miss my mama and my grandma. And my cousins. And my friends. Apparently, I can't stay away longer than a couple of months or I start metamorphosizing into a "Northerner." Eeek! I must (this is one of my Daddy's favorite sayings) "make like horse hockey and hit the trail!"

The house is coming along. Still working on it whenever we have a spare minute. I got new cabinet hardware... brushed nickel. This house has so many cabinets... I had to buy 56 drawer pulls - do you believe that?! There are 5 deer that live IN our backyard next to the "pond." Three babies, and 2 mamas. We also have raccoons. I have a feeling the raccoons are not going to be quite as nice to have around as the deer!

Well, my birthday is looming before me. Only 14 more days to go. I have not yet begun to panic, but the only thing I can think of that I want are "tummy tuck" jeans and a makeover. I must be panicking subconsciously.

Thingama-crab

My own little hermit crabs....
Sadie has made up her very first word. I think it means "thingamajig" or "whatchamacallit." Her word is... "Podie-Odie." As in, "Where's my podie-odie?" "I can't find my podie-odie." "Mommy, what did you do with my podie-odie?" "Hey! Look at that podie-odie!" It's pretty amusing, I must say.

Another amusing thing that's going on is Josie's new word(s). I tickle her all the time because her little belly laugh is the cutest thing in the world. So now she mimics me and says, "Tick-a-tick-a-tick-a-tick-a!" She also learned to blow her nose, which is pretty impressive for a one year old, I think.

Yesterday, their Grandma brought them each a hermit crab home from the beach. After a trip to the pet store, the crabs now live in virtual crab-luxury. They have a 4 star crab-condo. They have been christened "Sherrie" and "George." Sadie took George out today and held him in her hand, but when George peeked out to say hello, Sadie screamed and flung him up in the air. No wonder they're hermits.

Short and Sweet

Sadie: "Come on, people now, smile on your brudder, everybo-ey get togever, try and love one anudder right now. Right now!"

I taught Sadie this song Saturday, and she's got an amazing vocal range for a two year old... I wonder where she gets that from... heehee

Josie stood up on her own for the very first time yesterday! We were playing in the baby pool, and I looked away for a second. When I glanced back, there was Josie, wobbling upright on her chunky little legs and looking all proud of herself!

Just so you know, I am NOT giving up blogging... my time allotment is just very limited at the moment. We closed on the house, and now we're working working working on trying to get it repaired, cleaned, and in move-in condition. I promise I'll be back in full force in a month or so. I should have a lot to report by then :)

The Tale of the Three Trees

This is my new favorite story... every single time I read it, I dissolve into tears at the end. I bought it for Sadie and Josie, but now I'm thinking it's really for me. You should've seen me crying in the bookstore! This is a traditional folktale, retold by Angela Hunt. Read it and weep.

Once upon a mountaintop, three trees dreamed of what they wanted to be when they grew up.

"I want to hold treasure," the first tree said. "I will be the most beautiful treasure chest in the whole world!"

"I want to be a strong sailing ship," the second tree said. "I will be the strongest ship in the world."

"I don't want to leave this mountaintop at all," the third tree said. "I want to grow so tall that when people look at me they will raise their eyes to heaven and think of God. I will be the tallest tree in the world!"

One day, three woodcutters climbed the mountain. With a swoop of the first man's axe, the first tree fell. With a swish of the second man's axe, the second tree fell. With a slash of the third man's axe, the third tree fell.

The first tree rejoiced when the woodcutter brought him to a carpenter's shop, but the busy carpenter was not thinking about treasure chests. Instead, his work-worn hands fashioned the tree into a feed box for animals.

The second tree smiled when the woodcutter took him to a shipyard, but no mighty sailing ships were built that day. Instead, the once-strong tree was made into a simple fishing boat.

The third tree was confused when the woodcutter cut her into strong beams and left her in a lumberyard. "What happened?" the once tall tree wondered. "All I ever wanted to do was point to God."

Many, many days and nights passed. The three trees nearly forgot their dreams. But one night, golden starlight poured over the first tree as a young woman placed her newborn baby in the feed box. And suddenly the first tree knew he was holding the greatest treasure in the world.

One evening a tired traveller and his friends crowded into the old fishing boat. When a storm arose, the second tree shuddered. But when the traveller stretched out his hand, and said, "Peace," the storm stopped. And suddenly, the second tree knew he was carrying the King of heaven and earth.

One Friday morning, the third tree was startled when her beams were yanked from the woodpile. She shivered when she was dragged through an angry crowd. She shuddered when soldiers nailed a man's hands to her. She felt ugly and harsh and cruel.

But on Sunday morning when the sun rose and the earth trembled with joy beneath her, the third tree knew God's love had changed everything. It had made the first tree beautiful. It had made the second tree strong. And every time people thought of the third tree, they would think of God.

That was better than being the tallest tree in the world.

The Incredible Bulk

Funny things: Sadie said, "Mommy, give me my book. Oh, Mommy, I can't see without my glasses!" Hmm. I wonder which grandparent she's been listening to! Also, this afternoon, Josie had a little meltdown, and Sadie actually grabbed her own chest and said, "Oh, Josie, you're breakin' my heart!"

Josie's First Birthday party was yesterday. It was a big event! We had lots of people over, and she had cupcake balloons, her very own "smash cake," and lots of fun presents! Of course, she really couldn't care less about opening the presents. I had to keep grabbing her by the legs and dragging her back to my lap so I could force her to open them. She wanted to eat paper. Period. It was fun, though, and the highlight was definitely the cake! The smash cake was a yellow smiley face with a big green icing nose... she went for the nose first. She smushed it into her mouth and then proceeded to smear it ALL over her face, up her nose, in her ears, and then I guess her head started itching because it wound up there, too. Her Aunt Cindy and I ended up taking her straight to the bathtub. Apparently, icing is made of pure lard, because she was as slick as a greased pig (as we say in the South) when I tried to pick her up. Also, the water had a definite greenish tint when we were done. It was a good day :)

The good news is, I'm feeling better. The bad news is, Jesse is sick now. We just keep on passing it around and around. We're beginning work on the house now, so we have to get up to speed healthwise, for Pete's sake.

These are pictures from Aunt Lyd's wedding... Sadie was one of the flower girls, and Josie was just cute :) Last of all, I can't remember if I ever wrote this down or not, so here is the song that Sadie's grandpa made up to sing to her:

"Rock-a-bye, baby, in the treetops...
Hiding in the limbs, away from the cops...
I never should have taken that candy from the store...
If they'll forgive me, I'll steal no more!"

This is a source of constant entertainment for him, and for others! (I had to teach Sadie the real words, but now she thinks the other ones are the real ones :)

The Birthday Girl, Among Other Things

Well, it's finally over. My summer of "events." We finished up our Bible School today, and it was a smashing success, overall. Some of the kids even said it was the best one ever! So, we were very pleased (and even more relieved that it's all over with). Looking back on it, it was a great week. During the midst of it, I wouldn't have said that! :)

Today was Josie's birthday! We sang to her at church today, and she had her favorite food for supper - meatballs and watermelon. I told her I thought she was going to turn into a meatball if she didn't stop eating so many of them. She's so funny. She has new teeth, too! Now she has a total of 4 on the top and 3 on the bottom.

Sadie had to go to the doctor this afternoon... she's on the verge of bronchitis, and the doctor said that it sounds like I am, too! I guess it's coming from being so tired and run-down. She keeps saying she doesn't feel good, but now she also says, "Whatcha got there?" and, "Oh, yes I do," or "Oh, yes I am." Today she dumped sand on her head. Let me tell you, SAND is not easy to get out hair.

That's it. As my grandpa once said, "I'm just about done for." I think I could sleep for 4 days straight.

My Girls... Talkin' 'Bout My Girls

This is us at my cousin's wedding... finally, a cute picture of the three of us! Nobody's crying! Oh wait... I was crying right before this because I was watching a slide show about my little cousin growing up (*sniff) and now she's old and married! Oh, well, who cares? With 3 females, someone is always bound to be crying over something.

Funny things that happened:
Today, in the bathtub, Sadie put her foot into her toy boat and said, "Look at me! I have a boatshoe!" I found this to be hilarious, and so did Josie. Josie also figured out that bathwater (we call it "bootywater") is yummy to drink. She scoops it up in her little yellow cup, chugs it, snorts and chokes, and then goes, "Heh-heh-heh!"

She has also figured out that screaming is the way to get what she wants... this is a problem, since I cannot stand the screaming. Don't get me wrong... usually, she's a very sweet, cuddly, fun-loving little chunky baby. But, man! When she gets mad, it's just a disaster. It really reminds me of myself. It's scary. Also, Sadie is becoming a bonafied hypochondriac. For a week now, she's been saying, "Me don't feel good. My head hurts. My tummy hurts. Me need go to the doctor. Me need a vitamin. I need medicine. Me need to take my temperature. I just need to hold you, 'cause me don't feel good, Mommy." Sheesh. Also, reminding me of myself. I certainly hope they get some of my good qualities, too! (Although I can't think of any at the moment....)

So, I'm right in the middle of our Bible School... today was the first day, and it wasn't nearly as much of a disaster as we anticipated. It was actually somewhat fun. Sadie and Josie had a good time, although by the end, they were definitely past due for naps. So was I, for that matter.

Then, I had to run home, change clothes, scarf down lunch, and head to work. Same thing the rest of the week, except for Wednesday. Wednesday, I have to fit our house closing (gasp!) in between Bible School and work. You may ask, "How does she do it?" The answer is, "Heck if I know." :)

Awww

I don't have time to write much... it is the weekend of the wedding and Bible School prep, but I had to record this for posterity:

On the way home from the rehearsal tonight (Sadie is going to be one of the flower girls, along with her cousin Teagan), Sadie and Josie finally stopped crying. They were both more than pooped from a week of crazy preparation, all kinds of company, and bad colds/no appetite/fitful sleeping. They were sitting quietly in the backseat for a minute, and then Sadie sighs and says, "I'm happy, Mommy." Surprised, I said, "I'm glad... but why are you happy?" She said, "Because I love you." As if that weren't enough to stir my heart, Josie pipes up and says, "Ohhhh, Mama," like she was agreeing. It was the sweetest thing.

In other news, I finally got the MRI done yesterday - the right way this time - and I had my follow-up visit this morning. No surgery, which is good, but apparently I just have "loose joints." No, I'm not talking about illegal substances rolling around in my purse... :) He said that all of my joints are loose. I'm in for a lifetime of physical therapy and pain medicine that they give to arthritis patients. I must say, it's somewhat discouraging. I was hoping for a shot or a quick fix of some sort... not something like PT that will take up even more time that I don't have. Sigh.

Is everyone watching the war in Israel as closely as I am? I am glued to the TV. This can only mean one thing! To be continued....

No Time Like the Present

Well, I'm back from yet another vacation. This time to Wisconsin. Wisconsin: The vacation capital of North America :) Just kidding. We went to a week-long, family-oriented Bible school/conference thing, and I ended up having a really good time. At first, I thought, "Oh no. What was I thinking?!" But then, as the week went on, I had somewhat of a spiritual renewal. This is a really good thing, considering what a slump I have been in for the past few months.

When we got home, Josie came down with a fever, and she's had it for almost 3 days now. I think I'm going to take her to the doctor tomorrow. She's SO pitiful when she's sick. She's not super-fussy or cranky or anything... she's just lethargic and mopey. She wants to snuggle all the time, and she wants to put her little head on your chest and just stay there. I like the snuggling, but I hate that she has to be sick to want to do it!

BUT, the reason I am writing this right now is to VENT. I needed something cathartic, and this won out over 1) eating a whole bag of Oreos and 2) throwing myself off a cliff.

I have way too many things going on this summer. On top of all the travel, I've had one wedding and I have one more to go. I'm also coordinating our church's bible school. As most of you know, I've had chronic shoulder pain for about ten years now.... it just so happens that the best shoulder specialist in the Northeast had only one opening in months... and that's for this Friday. He ordered an MRI Arthrogram for me... that's where they stick this big needle into your joint and inject you with dye so they can see what's going on with your muscles/tendons/joint/etc. I went for that today (so he can give me the results when I see him on Friday). Well, in addition to taking THREE hours that I can't afford to lose this week, I went through x-ray, through this painful dye-shooting procedure, and through another hour in the scary MRI machine. For those of you who have never had one, it's very disconcerting. It sounds like a variation between a very loud jackhammer and a hundred little trolls banging on pipes with tiny little hammers. Plus, you can't move AT ALL, so of course you start itching all over. And you can't fall asleep, because you might jerk awake suddenly and move. So, the only thing to do is sit there and wait. Of course, I start thinking that the building might catch on fire, or aliens might attack, or terrorists might take over the hospitial... any number of crazy things... and I'd never know it, because I'm stuck in this TUBE o' DEATH with jackhammers and trolls beating a silly song all around my head!!!

Gasp. I seriously did almost panic. Finally, when it was over, lo and behold - the doctor who did the arthrogram was standing there waiting for me. "I put the dye in the wrong area," he said. "It went into the soft tissue and it needs to go into the fluid around the joint," or something stupid like that. "Sorry!" And he walked out. AARRGH! I was - am - so mad. I now have to take ANOTHER three hours that I don't have (the 2nd wedding is on Friday/Saturday, and bible school starts Sunday, plus Josie is sick and I'll probably have to take her to the doctor, not to mention that I'm working at WORK three days this week, not to mention that I'm still not all the way unpacked from my FIRST trip which was three WEEKS ago, not to mention that we might be closing on a house on Monday and I have to start worrying about moving!) and go BACK to the dumb hospital, get my shoulder poked and injected and sore all over again (it hurts, buddy) and sit in that troll tube for another 3 stinking hours.

There. I've said it. I feel somewhat better, but now I've wasted another 20 minutes just trying to de-stress. Calgon, take me away....

Catching Up

I know... it's been way too long. I've been on hiatus. We left for NC 2 weeks ago, and I made it all the way there with both kids intact. We got stuck behind an accident once on the way down, and I was getting stressed out and irritated. Sadie piped up from the backseat, "It's okay, Mommy. Just look outside at the flowers." It's sad when a 2 year old knows how to de-stress better than I do. Anyway, we finally made it, and they were just about perfect for the whole trip.

Notes of interest:
Sadie rode in the golf cart with Aunt Sharon and her cousins, and Josie got kicked in the tummy by Caleb (4 months her senior). He got in trouble. We ate pizza with Papaw and Mamaw. There was much "watering of plants" by Sadie and Great Grandma. Josie kept escaping through the backdoor and crawling down the ramp into the sunporch. Josie tried real milk for the first time. And cheese. Sadie told Grammie, "And NO snoring!" and told Great Grandma, "Me want to snuggle wif ya!"

Josie pulled up all by herself for the first time - on Great Grandma's cedar chest. They both went swimming in the pool at Papaw's house, and they had a grand ol' time splashing and squealing. We went to my cousin's wedding (I sang) which was outside in this gorgeous garden... but it was HOT. They had to wear sun hats, and they sat under an umbrella. Well, Sadie did. Josie mostly crawled around on the grass. Sadie started crying when I sang "How Beautiful;" she said it made her sad! I think it must've made her homesick. They were both a big hit at the reception... they got to hang out with lots of people from church and with cousins that they don't get to see very often, so it was fun.

They saw the baby bunnies at Cameron's house, and Sadie fed the goats. There was much playing and goofing around with Uncle Thomas, Josh, and Aunt Elizabeth. Thomas taught Sadie to say, "Holy Lord!" which is good only in a praying context. :)

The bad news: Sadie stepped on a bumblebee in the park and got stung on the back by a wasp (at Papaw's) on the SAME day. She squished the bumblebee ("Mean Ole Bee!") and Papaw took care of the wasps. The good news: She isn't allergic. She didn't swell at all and didn't cry very much either. Papaw showed her how toothpaste takes the sting right out (but only Crest!).

Sadie was jumping on the bed at Great Grandma's, and I sang the "5 Little Monkeys" song. When I got to the part about "Mama called the doctor and the doctor said:" Sadie answered, "Let me look into your ears...."

We also went to play with my cousin Heather's kids for a while, which was fun. We went to lunch with some friends that I used to work with, and we visited with lots of family. Seems like it takes at least a week to get everything in, and we still didn't make it everywhere that we wanted to go. It's amazing that there are so many people that we need to see and things that we need to do in such a small town!

I got a tan.

On Thursday, I left with 5 of my girlfriends from high school/ college for a girls' weekend. It was the first time I'd been away from either of the girls. I was scared! Of course, they didn't even miss me until the 3rd day. They had just as good of a time without me (which was somewhat of a blow to the old ego, but I'm thrilled that they're well-adjusted).

I had the most unbelieveably fun time with my friends... we definitely have to do a girls' trip more often. If we wait to do it just once every 10 years, we only have maybe 3 good trips left!!!

I'm saddened to report that the trip back was not quite so wonderful. We were stuck in traffic, we got behind an accident, and it RAINED. Not light, drizzly rain... MONSOON rain. The whole trip! Of course, since it was raining, my windshield wiper stopped working. The driver's side. The passenger side was fine, so for 2 hours I drove in the dark, in the pouring rain, leaned as far to the right as I could so I could see out the right side of the windshield. Then my phone died. I gave up. Went to a hotel. Tripped. Turned ankle. Whacked head on light fixture. Sheesh.

Thank goodness the rest of my trip was so wonderful!

Updates...

Josie learned to blow kisses! It is so cute! She puts her chubby little hand up to her mouth, goes *smooch, and then smiles her amazing little smile. I love it! Last night at supper, I told Sadie to please sit down in her chair the right way, and she shook her head sadly and said, "You're killin' me, Mommy." A couple of nights ago, Sadie dumped baby powder up her nose and we had to go to the emergency room (I called Poison Control, yet again :). Thankfully, she was fine, but she got to stay up 3 hours past her bedtime, play in the cool pediatric waiting room, eat animal crackers, and play with the doctor's stethoscope. She had such a good time that she didn't want to LEAVE the hospital, and the next day she came up to me and informed me, "I sick, Mommy. I need go to doctor." Sheesh. I am raising a hypochondria. In other news... we have 2 bids in on houses at the moment, so keep your fingers crossed. My voice is finally coming back, much to Jesse's chagrin. It's just in time for my cousin's wedding, at which I am supposed to be singing, next Saturday. One week! Yikes. I have the feeling I'm going to be drinking lots of honey and lemon in the near future. My all girls trip is just 2 short weeks away, and I can hardly wait... I'm already packing!

Fed Up

Today at lunch, Josie kept throwing her sippy cup in the floor. Sadie, good big sister that she is, went over to the high chair, picked up the cup, and gave it back to Josie. Josie threw it back down. Sadie picked it up. Josie threw it down. And laughed. Sadie picked it up. Gave it back. Josie threw it down. Sadie picked it up. Josie threw it down. Sadie yelled, "JUST DRINK IT, JOSIE-BEAN!!!" I think she must know how I feel sometimes, now....

Speak up, Mommy

I can't talk. From the time we came back to Ohio on Monday, I've been getting sicker and sicker. I finally went to the doctor today, and I have laryngitis, swollen lymph nodes, and a sinus infection. Joy!

The worst part is that I can't talk to the girls. I feel like I'm a bad mother because I haven't really spoken to them in two days. I hug them and play with them and feed them, but I can't say a word to them! This morning Sadie said, "Speak up, Mommy."

So, if anyone calls me and I don't call back, don't be offended. I'm not speaking to anyone. :)

This -n- That

Today at lunch, Sadie was eating half of a cheese sandwich and Josie was putting away blueberries by the dozen. Sadie said through a mouthful of bread, "Me love Daddy." I said, "You do? Who else do you love?" She said, "Me love Becky." "And who else?" "Me love Sarah." "You love Aunt Sarah? Who else do you love?" "Me love Scotty. And me love Angela. Angela like a turkey. Gobble-gobble-gobble-gobble!" I have no idea where this little insight came from, but it made me laugh. Josie is a full-fledged crawler now... she started on Thursday, and perfected her technique while we were in NC over the holiday weekend. Now she's getting fast! Sadie runs from her and says, "Don't get me, Jos-a-bean!" We had a good time over the weekend at home... the girls, as usual, get more love (and food) than they can stand. They ate livermush and bacon for breakfast every morning (courtesy of Grammie and Great Grandma). Sadie got to feed the birds ("Come and get it, birds!") and she found a little bird's egg with Grammie. She had a great time pushing around this little toy grass-seed spreader that Grammie got for her. She also dressed up in every piece of jewelry that Mama owns, and walked around saying, "Look at me! I beautiful!" Which is true. :) Josie cracked herself up looking in the full length mirror in Great Grandma's room... she thinks (and is correct) that she is just about the most beautiful baby ever to grace the planet. We rode the golf cart with Scotty and Angela, fed the baby goat with Cameron, played with Uncle Thomas and Aunt Elizabeth, Josh, and Natasha, went to a cookout with Lou, Brenda, Becky, Stephen, little Hailey, Chass, and her three wild kids (her little boy, Dalton, took Sadie's picture down the other day and carried it through the house saying, "My Sadie, my Sadie... I love her so!"). We got to watch a video of Kimmie singing at her church, which brought me almost to tears... she looked just like her mama and me when we first starting singing long long LONG ago at church. It was so cute. Then we went out to breakfast/lunch at this cool old home-cooking place way up in the mountains with "Papaw and Mamaw." We ended up staying there for almost 4 hours.... After we ate, we all sat out on the big front porch by the little creek and listened to old-timey mountain music. The lady that was singing asked for volunteers from the audience, so of course Daddy and I ended up on the stage, singing "Blessed Redeemer" and "In the Garden." Sadie finally came up and gave a rendition of "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star," and her old standby "A Bushel and a Peck." It was a lot of fun. Probably the highlight of Sadie's trip (besides getting to sleep with Grammie and say, "Stop snoring, Grammie!!!") was riding with Papaw on his HUGE new tractor. She was so excited about it, and she's been telling everyone. Oh, and she also got to paint her toenails green, just like Mamaw. All in all, we had a good trip. I didn't even cry when we left this time... because we're going back in (count 'em) THREE weeks.

I Repeat, We Have a Sadie Down

On Sunday, Jesse didn't go to church. He was recovering from a late night at a Pearl Jam concert the night before. Brave soul that I am, I decided to take both kids and go by myself. Without backup! Sunday School was fine (Sadie LOVES Sunday School and goes in there all by herself), but then the actual service started. At first, all was well... Sadie busied herself with pulling out all the hymn books, stacking them up on the pew and then putting them all back in the seat in front of us. Josie "sang" as loud as she could during the first couple of hymns. I thought, "Hmm. This isn't as bad as I thought! I can do this!" Then, Josie started fussing for her bottle. I gave it to her, and she proceeded to make these immensely loud slurping and "gulk, gulk, gulk" noises. Before I could get her quieted down, Sadie informed me (not in her quiet voice) that she "Need see James now! Need go see Grandma!" Josie started squirming; Sadie took her sippy cup and about 4 bags of snacks out the diaper bag and threw them down. While I was picking them up, Josie started crying, and Sadie tried to get my reserve juice box out of the bag. This was all too much commotion, so I finally just stuffed everything in the bag, scooped up Josie, and scooched Sadie out the end of the pew in front of me, toward the back door. Well, as we were headed out, she decided to make a pit stop by the FIRE EXTINGUISHER. She opened the glass door in front of it, grabbed it, and was just about to pull it down and set off who knows what kind of alarms when I nudged her with the end of the diaper bag (in my semi-free hand). Of course, instead of just moving along to the door like she should have, she tripped and fell and thunked her head and her knee on the floor and started bawling. This was all in front of EVERYone. Of course I felt terrible, because I essentially pushed my child down, even though it was an accident. When we finally made it to the nursery, they took turns crying and pooping until it was time to go home. For Pete's sake. This isn't exactly the "religious persecution" I thought was going to befall me in the last days....

A Bushel and a Peck

Well, it's been a week, and I think I have gotten over the injustice suffered last week at the hands of the American public. No, I'm not talking about the political appointments as of late... if you're a regular reader, you know what I'm talking about! By the way, SOME people have voiced some criticism of my favorite show (excepting Dr. Phil, of course)... I won't name any names, but I will say this: I think it's better to sit at home with my dog and watch a hyped up version of Star Search than to be out doing numerous other things, like, oh, say, getting a nose ring!!! :) Enough of that, though. I digress. Bad news: I have seriously fallen off the diet wagon since my killer death stomach flu a couple of weeks ago. I guess I was just making up for lost time, eating-wise. Good news: I climbed (albeit with some huffing and puffing and overall exertion) back onto the diet wagon yesterday, even dusting the treadmill off late last night. Funny things that happened over the past week: Jesse was in charge of the Mother's Day dinner at church, and they did various kinds of entertainment, which was fun. Sadie kept saying, "Me want microphone. Me want sing in microphone like Mommy." I finally took her up front to "sing" in front of 70+ people, figuring that she would just get all shy and clam up once we were there. Boy, was I in for a surprise! She sang, "I love you, a bushel and a peck, a bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck..." She filled in the whole chorus while holding the microphone... she was a pro! I, on the other hand, got so tickled that she was actually DOING it that I couldn't stop laughing. It was the cutest thing EVER! When she was done (amidst thunderous applause) she said, "Thank you, thank you so much." And then she looked at me and said, "Me did it! Me did it!... Me want sing again, Mommy." I think we may have a born performer here. Josie spent almost the entire evening hamming it up with one of the older ladies at church - having a great time. She has started squealing and squeeking and sniffing and generally just finding her "voice." I'm telling you - with those cheeks, coupled with the chubby hand clapping - she is so cute that it hurts to look at her. My eyes! My eyes!!

Oh, the Agony!

Are you kidding me?! This is terrible, bad, awful, horrendous! I cannot even write about it. It's too painful. Okay... I must say it, in case you do not follow the show - Chris has been robbed. Voted off, kicked off, ka-put. I think he was even more shocked than I was, and I was pretty shocked. That's it. I'm done with the show. Now I have to wait around until his CD comes out.

Just like Mommy

Yesterday, Sadie put on my sandals, my sunglasses, and my bracelet. She came into the kitchen where I was and said, "Look at me! Me just like Mommy!" She also says things like, "Me like Daddy. Me go to work, too."
"Me busy like Mommy. Me sing like Mommy." It suddenly hit me (like a ton of bricks to the chest) that she really does want to be just like me. I happened to think of something Dr.Phil said (surprise, surprise): "The absolutely most important role model that a child will ever have is that child's same-sex parent." Well, that's ME. For both of them. What an awesome and unbelieveable responsibility that is. Am I up for the challenge? Do I dare risk messing up their little lives because I can be such a selfish moron? Honestly, when I think back on some of the awful and stupid and flat-out wrong things that I have done, I can't help but think that I just don't deserve to be someone's role model - especially not when the "someones" involved are as precious and wonderful as my children. I'm not proud of a great deal of my past... there are things that I'd never want them to know about me. And I wonder if it's better to tell them those things eventually and hope they'll learn from my mistakes, or to just try to lead by a good example NOW. I have to really get to work on being a better person, because they are already always watching. I pray that God will help me not to be the person that I once was, but to be the person that they deserve to have as their mommy. Geez. I'm making myself cry here. Does anyone else feel this way, or am I just hormonal?

My New Theme Song

http://mp.aol.com/video.index.adp?mode=2&pmmsid=1346509

Big News

Tonight, Sadie pee-peed in the potty!!! We were all so excited, whooping and hollering and clapping and calling everyone to share the good news... Sadie was so caught up in all the excitement, she said, "Me need go pee-pee in potty again!"

Josie got her 2nd top tooth yesterday (yay!). She still isn't crawling, but boy is she MOVING. As soon as I turn my back, she's scooched, wriggled, or rolled her way to wherever she feels like going. Unfortunately, tonight she felt like going to the side of the tub, pulling up on it (first time for pulling up on ANYthing) and sliding down... thereby whacking her lip right into her new front tooth. Ouch!! This all happened in less than 3 seconds... I'm telling you, the kid is FAST.

Funny joke:
The psychology professor was lecturing on emotional extremes. "For example," the professor asked one student, "what is the opposite of joy?" The student replied, "sadness." "And the opposite of depression?" he asked another. "Elation," the student replied. Looking toward a transfer student from North Carolina, the professor asked, "And you sir, what is the opposite of woe?" The mountain boy replied, "Wellsir, I reckon that would be giddy-up." Heehee!

Say Cheese, Matey!

Yesterday, I took the girls for a walk through the neighborhood. Sadie took her "camera," with her - a rectangular shaped yellow block with a hole in the middle of it. The whole time we were walking, she was up front in the stroller "taking pictures" and saying, "Say cheese, mailbox! Say cheese, rock! Say cheese, water fountain! Say cheese, woman! Say cheese, dirt!" Josie seconded these requests by growling this low, deep, throaty growl that she's been perfecting for the last few days... she sounds like a pirate. So I guess if you had been walking beside us it would've sounded more like, "Cheese, grrrrrr. Cheese, grrrrr." Arrrgh, mateys!

My Indian Princesses - Tigerfoot and Chunky Monkey

This afternoon, I was trying to explain the meaning of being "barefoot" to Sadie. I tried to tell her that there is a difference between "bare" and "bear." She was a little confused, and proceeded to tell me that she was NOT barefoot, but "Tigerfoot."

Josie is still teething... and is fit to be tied! She has incredible separation anxiety right now - every time I leave the room for 2 seconds, she melts into a little puddle of tears and screams bloody murder. It wouldn't be so bad if not for the fact that she zooms from fine to "TICKED OFF" in about 10 seconds flat. It's amazing... and sometimes, (I know it's mean) I just have to laugh. Her little chubby face gets SO red and she just balls up her fists and shakes with rage. It's totally me all over, especially when I have PMS :) I have dubbed her the "Chunky Monkey."

Current Events

Good news: I think I'm going to live. I had a bit of a relapse last night, so I didn't go to church today, but I'm feeling better this evening. I think (knock on wood) that it's all over. *Sigh* of relief, definitely. Tonight as I was putting Sadie to bed, she grabbed her pajama pants, stuffed them around Snoopy (who was cuddled in her arm), and said, "Snoopy's going to take a nap in my pants." Now, that's not something you hear everyday. Yesterday, I gave her some chicken soup and I asked her if she was going to eat it with her spoon. Her reply: "Well, actually, Mommy, I think I will drink it." That was a new one for my two-year-old. Good grief. If she weren't so sweet, her smartness would scare me. (Oh, who am I kidding? It does scare me. Both she AND Josie are going to be 10 times smarter than me... I just know it!) Josie is -this- close to getting her 2nd top front tooth. She is so cute that it's hard to talk about! I cannot capture her unbelievable cute-cuddliness in words. I just want to SQUEEZE her... but I must restrain myself. In other news... the house hunt continues. We have looked at dozens in the past few weeks; the building thing is still up in the air, in case we don't find something that we like. The WE part is the problem. We have found a couple that he likes and a couple that I like, but we haven't reached a common consensus yet. Today we looked at one with tons of built-in bookshelves all over the house (a definite +++ for me) and lots of potential... of course, he doesn't like the basement or the garage. Sheesh. Oh, and we're going home for Memorial Day! Yahoo!!!

Ugh

Sorry it's been so long, but I have a good excuse. I have been nigh unto death with some sort of killer flu. Seriously. I won't go into the grisly details, but I lost 8 pounds in a 36 hour period. I want to lose some weight, but if this is how I have to do it, just call me Roly Poly.

One Lump or Two?

Today, we went to tea at a real, live tea shoppe! It was Sadie's (and Josie's) first "tea party," and lucky girls... they got to have it with not one, but TWO grandmas in tow! You should have seen Sadie sipping her tea (pink lemonade) out of her very own little china cup. It was the cutest thing! She also got a little heart shaped sandwich, miniature spoon, and tiny little pieces of fruit. She thought it was so cool, and she tried to act grown up... at least for a little while! Meanwhile, Josie entertained herself by pulling off her socks, throwing spoons in the floor, smearing her face with cookies and chunks of potato, and generally wreaking havoc while still being the cutest baby ever - as only she can do. :)

Funny things that happened today: I took Josie into the ladies' room at the tea shoppe to change her diaper, and I thought we were alone. She was making this "ah-ah-ah-ah" noise over and over because she liked the echo in the bathroom. After a couple of minutes of this (with her getting louder and louder all the time), I said, "You like to hear yourself talk, don't you? You're just like your daddy!" Then I heard muffled laughter coming out of one of the stalls and this lady came out and said, "Just like her daddy, huh?" She cracked up. I was a wee bit embarrassed. Also, Mama taught Sadie the little hand game that says, "Here's the church, here's the steeple, open the doors, and here's the people!" At the end, when you flip your hands over and wiggle your fingers, ie: "the people," Sadie adds her own little 2 cents. This is Sadie's version: "Here the church. Here the steeple. Open door, and here the people! And thumbs!" Oh, man. We laughed so hard. She's a goof. Later, after we got home, Josie decided to steal Sadie's sippy cup when she wasn't looking (she's becoming very mobile, and she's rolling and scootching around to get to what she wants now). She then tipped over backwards, rolled over on her back on the floor, held the cup up with her hands AND her feet, and intentionlly splashed water all over her face. She would shake it, sling water on herself, suck in her breath (it was cold), then laugh and laugh. How funny!

Sick and Scootchin'

I know I haven't been keeping up for the past week, but I have a good reason... my mama is here for the whole week! Yahoo! When Sadie first saw her, she said, "Me miss you so much, Grammie! Me miss you so much ALL DAY LONG!" We've had a really good time, so far (up until yesterday, that is). We've done almost everything on my list (yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am a list-maker): shopping for Easter dresses, going to Chuck E. Cheese, shopping for shoes, getting massages, going for walks outside, playing on the playground, cooking, playing with play-dough, and generally just goofing off and having a good time. However, yesterday afternoon, Sadie (suddenly and without warning) came down with a horrible bug. She went around crying, clinging to me and to mama and saying, "Me don't feel good. Me want go to bed now." Bless her little heart. We felt so sorry for her! She had a fever all night and most of today... she's doing a little better, but I hate that she's sick. I would SO much rather be the sick one than to watch her feel bad. Josie, on the other hand, hasn't slowed down one bit... yesterday, I left her sitting on the floor in front of our bed with a basket of toys while I went into the kitchen. After being gone for less than two minutes, I came back in to find her scootched backwards on her tummy all the way under the bed. All I could see was the top of her head and her little, smiling cheeks. She thought she was so smart!! Easter Sunday, one of her top teeth finally pushed its way through, and now she's gritting and grinding her teeth (Sadie did the same thing, and I do it in my sleep). I just find that hilarious, given the fact that she only has THREE teeth.

The Boot

Gasp! You see what happens when I don't get to vote? Egads! You-know-who ends up in the bottom 3! Oh man, oh man, I would never have forgiven myself if he'd gotten the boot and I didn't get to vote for him! As it is, I'm fairly happy that the other guy is gone. He was a simpering whiner, as far as I could tell. I'm so mean. I can't believe I waste my time typing about this total waste of time. Oh well. I guess everyone has to have SOMEthing wrong with them... I guess this is better than some of the alternatives....

What is Your Emergency?

Tonight, Mama kept the girls while I went to choir practice. When I called to check on them, she informed me that Josie had called 911. Keep in mind that Josie is not yet 9 months old. I was a bit confused.... But apparently, the cordless phone was on the floor and Josie picked it up and started playing with it. She hit/bit a few buttons, then Mama took it from her and turned it off. Less than a minute later, it rang. "This is the emergency operator. What is your emergency?" Mama said, "Huh?" "Someone from this number called 911, ma'am." "Oh!! I guess the baby dialed it accidently." "Nonetheless, ma'am, an officer is on his way." SO... my child already has the police at our house, and she's not even 1 yet. Sheesh. Between the police and the Poison Control Hotline, I'm going to be on all kinds of child-protection lists. :)

My Evil Twin

I've been trying to deny it, but I think I may be the mother of a strong willed child. Josie's personality is almost the opposite of what Sadie's was when she was 9 months old... I'm afraid to admit it, but *whisper* Josie is exactly like me! What I mean is, she's all loving and cute and adorable and friendly one minute, and the next minute something ticks her off (ie: I won't let her eat plastic. I won't let her eat my cell phone. I won't let her eat styrofoam. I won't let her eat wet wipes. I won't let her eat her diaper.) and she shakes her fists, stiffens up, arches her back, throws her head back, and screams her little lungs out. She can throw a real, honest-to-goodness temper tantrum. It's scary. I've always joked about how Sadie is Jesse's clone, but yipes... I may have one, too! Funny things that happened today: Sadie wanted more cheese at supper, and I told her that she'd had enough. She replied, "Eat more cheese. Me eat cheese ALL DAY LONG!" Through the baby monitor, I heard Josie wake up from her nap, say "duh, duh, duh, doh, doh, duh" like she was counting, and start kicking her little legs like she was riding a bike... this makes her crib mattress go squeaky-squeaky-squeaky-squeaky over and over. It's funny to hear it, but not as funny to type it. :) Lastly, I totally slammed the top of my thigh right into the sharp corner of my keyboard tray as I was getting up, and instead of yelling or shouting obscenities (which you all know I really try not to ever do), I said, "Now , that's a pain that's gonna linger." LOL - hopefully, some of you know my old friend Ed Grimley, and you can appreciate that little tidbit.

This Little Piggy Went "Aaarrgh!!!" Almost All the Way to Get Stitches

Today, Josie was sucking on her toes, and I said, "Yum, yum! Those toes must be YUMMY!" Sadie proceeded to try them herself, since Josie was enjoying them so much.... The next thing I knew, Sadie had Josie's toes between her teeth, BITING them hard, and Josie was screaming in pain. I need to watch what I say. Apparently, two year olds take things very literally.

Contest

I entered a contest about why a mom should earn 130K a year... in 100 words or less. This is what I came up with:

As the mother of two girls under two, my day is never boring! As a matter of fact, it's a messy roller coaster of hugs, tears, boo-boos, squeals of laughter, cheerios all over the kitchen floor, spit-up in my hair, poop, poop, and more poop, "booty water" in the bathtub, silly songs, bedtime stories, and good night prayers. Raising two beautiful, intelligent, responsible girls in a world such as ours is not worth $130,000 a year. It's worth so much more... yet I'd do it forever for just one slobbery kiss and one heartfelt declaration: "Me love you, Mommy."

Squishy Butt

Yesterday, we went to a real, live, working farm. The girls both loved it. The big hit of the day with Sadie was getting to see a huge cow (close up) and a milking demonstration. When they asked who would like to help milk the cow, Sadie was the first one to volunteer! She jumped up and said, "Me do it!" She's such a helper. Anyway, she chickened out when we actually got close to the cow, but she stood there while I milked the cow. Yes, I said I MILKED A COW. We explained to her that when you squeeze the cow's udder, the milk comes squirting down into the bucket. She was mesmerized. However, for the rest of the day, all she could say was, "Squishy butt! Milk come out!"

Behind the cow was a little goat pen. A white goat set its sights on Josie's feet, and he stuck his head through the slats of the pen and began to nibble on them. Josie thought this was funny, and it would have made a fabulous picture, had Yours Truly been able to find the stupid camera. By the time I dug it out of the bottomless pit (ie: the diaper bag), the goat had moved on to bigger and better? things - Jesse's coat.

Next, we headed out to the chicken coop, where both girls (and both parents) were fascinated by these crazy looking chickens... they had huge afro hairdos - made of feathers, of course. One of them kept looking at Jesse like he wanted to peck his eyes out... this foul fowl even kicked dirt out at him through the wire of the cage. I came to the conclusion that chickens are just plain scary. Sadie went around yelling "cock-a-doodley-doo!" and "Eat corn! Eat corn!" until we fled the scent - I mean, scene.

The sheep were our next stop, and they were a real treat because lots and lots of baby lambs had just been born (it is spring, FINALLY, after all). Sadie clapped her hands and said, "Here sheeps! Here sheeps!" and miraculously, a cute little fuzzy lamb trotted over to see her and Josie. It took a great liking to Josie, and she squealed and laughed and tried to grab its head with both hands. She loved petting it, even more than Sadie did. Sadie was more interested in climbing up the fence and yelling, "Look at me!" and "I see poop! Sheep poop! Goat poop!"

At one point, two little lambs came over to the fence and climbed up on their mom's back and almost escaped! Then Mom stood up and shook them off, and one of them banged his head on the fence post. Sadie said, "Ow - he bumpeed head!"

We saw piglets, horses, calves, turkeys, ducks, and all kinds of things! It was altogether a fun trip. Jesse and I have decided to become farmers. Now if I can just get ahold of some Kevlar body armour, I can take care of those chickens....

Almost forgot...

High for the day: Josie cracking up for 20 minutes straight, hiccoughs and all, because I blew one of those little roll-up paper party favor things at her. She LOVED it. Low for the day: See below!

Care-Line-A

Why doesn't someone just go ahead and rip my heart out and stomp on it? Tonight, as Sadie was saying her prayers, she said, "God bless Mamaw, and Papaw. Mommy, need see Papaw now. Need see Papaw and Mamaw and Grammie Poopsie, and Cameron. And goats, and cow - feed cow with bottle with Papaw! Cow poop! Papaw - cow poop, with leaves! (he covered up cow poop with leaves as they were feeding the baby cow last time we went to NC). Need see Grammie! Need feed birds with Grammie... come and get it, birds! Mommy, get in car. Go Care-line-a. Get my shoes on." I'm telling you, it was heart-wrenching. I had to kiss her , turn off the light, and leave the room so I wouldn't start bawling all over the place and scare her. It's one thing for ME to be homesick, but when a two year old is homesick with absolutely no prompting from anyone, it's time for a visit. For Pete's sake.

Potatoes and Applesauce

So I'm climbing the hill out of the slump... a little bit at a time. It helped that it was actually a nice day today - it was 60 degrees and sunny! We went to the park and I got to walk a couple of miles with the girls in the stroller without all of us turning blue and freezing our cheeks off. I'm thinking that this is some kind of a cosmic joke, though. I'm waiting for the other shoe (or should I say SNOW) to fall. I've been doing more Billy Blanks Bootcamp. Not great results, so far... I mainly just feel like a horse kicked me in the stomach. I couldn't get out of the car yesterday. Not much going on in my life right now, with the exception of the kids... they're always going, going, going. High(s) for the day: I got to take a nap! I got two kinds of new shoes! Low(s) for the day: I ate lots of potatoes for supper, and we all know that potatoes are poison. Sadie took about 47 stamps off of the roll and plastered them all over the basement and her play kitchen. Josie snorted applesauce up her nose and cried for 20 minutes (with kind of a nasally voice). Not sure if she was mad because it was up her nose, or because she wasted part of it when what she really wanted to do was eat it. She gives the phrase, "It was so good that I inhaled it" a totally new meaning.

The Big 0-2

Well, I am officially the mother of a pre-schooler. I can't believe how fast the past two years have gone by. I also can't remember what I ever did (for fun or otherwise) before I became a mom... That means: a) I never really had that much fun to start with; b) It wasn't really that important; or c) I'm losing it big time, and just can't remember. Fun things that happened today: Sadie got "birthday eggs" to eat for breakfast this morning. We all went to lunch at Chuck E. Cheese, and she got to eat a whole tiny pizza all by herself (with pep-ronis, of course). We then went to Toys-R-Us and her Daddy let her pick out any toy she wanted... a girl after my own heart... she chose a huge box of pretend food to go in her play kitchen! She got TWO whole juice boxes (usually she is rationed to one a day). She talked with Grammie, Papaw, Mamaw, Sarah, and her cousin James on the phone today. She got two birthday emails - one from Josh and one from Melanie. She got a birthday package in the mail (from the south) from my friend Becky... it's this cute little dog with a pink collar. She named her "Bear." She said, "Oh, come and see, see my doggy Bear," which can be a little confusing. She got balloons from Aunt Lydia (and immediately popped the blue one as she was jumping around in sheer delight), and a cool pink hairbrush and hairbows from Melissa (she proceeded to share her glee with Melissa by thunking her in the head with the hairbrush, Ninja-style). She got to play outside (she put a little terra-cotta bird on a big rock and said, very politely, "Would you like to sit here on this rock for just a minute, Bird?" Then when he fell off, she said, "Oh no! Bird, are you okay?" Josie thought this was great, and squealed her approval, so Sadie let her hold Bird for a second. Just a second, though. She got cake after supper, and then a bubble bath to soak off all of the blue icing, which was all over her from the neck up. Josie (not to be outdone) had spinach completely covering the lower half of her face, and somehow managed to paint two little spinach eyebrows on her forehead. I'll post a picture of that asap. High for the day: Sadie saying, "Oh, thank you, Mommy. Thank you so much!" (for her sour-apple ring-pop from the toy store). All in all, it was a good day. They are good kids. They are good for my spirit.

I'm Okay, You're Okay

Today, Sadie was running around like a little crazy person. There is a huge refrigerator box in our great room that I'm converting into a carnival game. Right now, though, it's a giant toy for Sadie (Josie doesn't like it - we put her in there, but she just cries. I think she may be claustrophobic). Anyway, Sadie was running around and around and around it, climbing up on the couch and then jumping down behind it. She did this 8 or 9 times with no incident... then, she tripped over a cushion on the couch and landed - *SPLAT* - on her face on the floor. Instead of crying, she immediately springs back up to her feet and says, "Me okay, Mommy. Me O-KAY."

Poop-eye the Sailor Mom

Have you ever had a day full of poop? I don't mean just a typical, ordinary bad day. I'm not using a metaphor here. I seriously mean full of poop. I don't know if the girls were saving it up for me for a couple of days, or what... but I changed at least 17 poopy diapers today. No kidding.

Imagination Station

Okay. I know that I am blessed with a very intelligent, very precocious child. This is a good thing. However, the whole imagination thing is getting well underway WAY too early, in my opinion. The other night when she was convinced that there was "somebody down there" was one thing, but now she's freaking herself out, not to mention her poor old mother (namely, me). Tonight we were in her room, doing the usual routine to get ready for bed. Suddenly, she stops and looks into the corner of the room. She freezes, then runs over to me, jumps on my lap, snuggles her face into my shoulder, and starts crying, "Lexy scares me! Lexy scares me!" (Lexy is my sister-in-law's dog, and she would never hurt a flea. She's more of a chicken than a dog). I told her that Lexy wasn't here, that there was nothing there, that nothing was going to hurt her, etc., but she kept looking over over shoulder, tensing up, and crying. Then she pulled her feet and her hands in and stuck them between her body and mine, to keep them from being exposed... like something was going to bite her! After a few minutes of this, I convinced her to get up so we could go downstairs and get some milk. But as we were walking down the hallway, she kept looking behind her, getting all wild-eyed, JUMPING up on me, and crying, "Lexy scares me!" Okay. Was this a remnant of a leftover dream from naptime or something? She never mentioned being scared when she woke up from her nap today. She gets her imagination from me, I'm sure of it. I always had a tremendously vivid imagination... still do. Instead of trying to calm her fears and reassure her, I feel like saying, "What?! Where? Where's the scary dog hiding? Let's get out of here!" I don't know what I'm going to do! I need advice (other than Jesse's, which is consistently, "Just grow up." :)

The Slump

So I'm in a bit of a slump. Physically, spiritually, mentally... something's wrong with me (besides the obvious). I can't seem to get motivated in any way, shape, or form. Haven't worked out in two days. Feel like sleeping all the time. Need to read at least 5 different books, but can't get started on any of them. Pray, but the prayers seem to get stuck... they go up to the ceiling and kind of hover there instead of going higher like they're supposed to. It's getting very annoying.

Good movie: Just Like Heaven. Total chick-flick. Melissa, Deanna, Lydia and I all piled on my bed and watched it on Saturday night. I laughed. I cried. It's kind of cheesy, but that's my kind of movie.

High for the day: After only one year, six months, and 5 days, the house closed this morning.

Sadie ran up to Grandma Beth and said, "Grandma, you need to change me now. Need clean diaper." I think she's definitely ready for potty-training. Josie learned to clap her hands a couple of days ago - it is so cute! Sadie skipped the whole hand-clapping thing. I think she actually just learned how about 3 months ago. So the cute fat baby clapping her chubby little hands is a real treat.

Well, I must go and return to my slump.

Tastes Like Chicken

Today, on the way home from church, Sadie was a little too quiet in the backseat. Upon closer inspection, we find that she has her finger up her little nose. Jesse said, "Sadie, that's not nice! Stop doing that." She stops, looks down at her finger, and says, "Huh. A boo-ger." A couple of minutes go by, then she yells, "Mommy! Daddy! Boo-ger! Boo-ger in mouth!" That's pretty self-explanatory. Yuck. Jesse says, "Sadie! We don't eat boogers! That's yucky! Take it out!" She thinks about it, then says, "Tastes like turkey." We burst out laughing, and then she says, "Taste it, Mommy! Taste it!" I, of course, declined. When she figured out that I wasn't going to taste it, she changed tactics... "Taste it, taste it, Mommy! Tastes like... ham!" Jesse and I were totally cracking up by this point, and Sadie tried one more time: "Daddy, Mommy, say 'Aahhhh!' Tastes like turkey, tastes like ham!"

Yikes

Okay. Tell me if you think this is just a little freaky. The kids and I are home alone, and I'm upstairs putting them to bed. After I zip up her pj's, Sadie goes out of her room onto the landing, looks down into the great room, comes running back to me, and says, "Somebody's down there." I said, "No there isn't... nobody's home but us." She looks at me very seriously, nods her head up and down, and says, "Mommy, somebody's down there." Yikes. I've got to tell you, things like that make me a little nervous! (If you need further proof, see my previous post, I Sees It, But I Don't Believes It) After I put Josie in her crib, Sadie decides she needs a drink of water (she's becoming a great staller) so we go back downstairs to the kitchen. She then proceeds to go out into the hallway, wave, and say, "Hi! Hi!" to absolutely no one at all. Call me a chicken if you must, but come on! That's scary!

Thank you, God

Every night, I sing Sadie a lullaby that I made up when I was only 4 or 5 years old and in the hospital. It's about angels sleeping in the clouds at night and Jesus watching over us... it's so sweet when she sings along. I love the fact that she's singing a song that I actually wrote for her - for her and Josie - long before she was ever born... long before I ever even thought about having my own children. Anyway, after the song and a bedtime story or two, we say her prayers. Sometimes, we hold hands, but usually, she likes to fold her little hands together, bow her head, and squinch her little eyes shut. She recites a list of things to thank God for, and most of the time, it goes something like this: Thank you, God, for Mommy, Daddy, Josie-bean, Papaw, Mamaw, Rudy (Woo-dy), Joey, Grammie, Grammie Poopsie, Great-Grammie, Pitsie (Pixie) Grandpa, Grandma, Deanna, Lynn, Lyd-lia, Say-ruh, 'Lissa, Becky, and Games! (James), Teagan, and Uncle Games (Big James), Cam-e-ron, goats, Rabbit poop, Juice Boxes, Sunday School, Cake, Pie, Ice Cream, Buddy, Doggies, and Snoopy.

The Stand-Off

High noon. A lone tumbleweed blows across the driveway. I find this a bit strange, since we're in Ohio. Nonetheless. In the distance, music plays. No, it's not a ballad from an old Clint Eastwood movie. It's worse. More sinister. It's Raffi. It's "Baby Beluga."

We meet again. A smile plays the corner of her mouth. Her hair is windblown. Or should I say... she has bedhead. She's the meanest bandit this side of the Rio Grande. She's Sadie the Kid. And what's worse is that she has her sidekick, Mean Green Josephine, right by her side. She looks me right in the eye. She's not scared. She laughs. So cute that it's frightening; yet I can't look away.

We're not fighting over cattle. We're not fighting over whiskey. We're not even fighting over bedtime. It's much worse than that. It's... it's... spinach. "Don't like it!" she yells. She glares at me through squinty eyes. If looks could kill, I'd be a goner. She reaches for her weapon. It's a 4-prong pewter revolver. Without even counting to three, she chucks it at me. Spinach flies. Mean Josephine roars her infamous roar, then laughs. They don't call her Mean "Green" for nothing. The mashed peas all over her face don't leave any questions unanswered.

I won't lie. I'm scared. I'm outnumbered. They've got me surrounded. Will brains or brawn prevail? I do the only thing I can think of. I try to talk her down. I threaten her with jail. I threaten her with whippins. I even threaten her with No Juicebox. The only thing that makes her blink an eye is the thought of the dreaded time-out. She leans back... she lowers her backup weapon... I can tell she's weighing her options. Mean Josephine cries out in disbelief, "Blab-ab-ab-AH!" as if to say, "Don't do it, Kid! Don't listen to her threats!" But I know I've got her on the run.

When she asks for her Snoopy, I know I have her. Sheriff Mommy wins this feud. But just how far will Sadie the Kid and Mean Green Josephine go to rule the West - um, I mean, Northeast? Stay tuned to find out.

Bad Day

Today was not good. I woke up in a fairly good mood, and Sadie yelled, "Waff-els! Need waff-els!" as soon as she woke up, so she actually ate more than two bites for breakfast this morning. That was the highlight of my day. It was all downhill from there. I got in a huge fight with my mom over the phone, and ended up hanging up on her, which I NEVER do to ANYONE, because I think it is so rude. Hence, I proceeded to feel guilty for the rest of the day. Then we found out that our house is not closing on the specified date AGAIN, and I may have to pay another house payment AGAIN (and still have no house of my own to live in). If that weren't enough, I am super hormonal, I got my hair cut (it looks stupid), my phone died, Sadie ate dog food, Josie stuck her hand in poop when I wasn't looking, the dog tracked mud on the carpet (and he has enormous paws - he weighs about 160 lbs, you know), my shoulder is aching from yesterday's pork chop fight (yes, I punched a frozen pork chop because it refused to come loose from the cellophane wrapper), I have a zit, Josie spit green beans all over the front of my favorite shirt, and I ended up locking myself in the bathroom to sob for 40 minutes, during which time Sadie banged repeatedly on the door yelling, "Knock, knock! Who is it? It's me, Sadie!" So, I'm done for the day...hopefully I won't trip over the bedspread and suffocate in my pillow.

The Pantless Wonder

Josie has reached that developmental stage in which "separation anxiety" is the norm. It's getting ridiculous! She'll be fine until she sees me, then she revs it up and screams her little lungs out until I pick her up or she collapses in a tired, sniveling heap... whichever comes first. She usually wins, I'm ashamed to admit. I'm a pushover, and her cry is so pitiful! It sounds like her little heart will break at any moment if she doesn't get what she wants RIGHT THIS SECOND. I am afraid she's getting the temper from my daddy's side of the family... the same one that he and I both have. Uh-oh. Sadie lucked out and got Jesse's laid-back attitude, but I think Josie is going to be a spitfire.

Today, after I changed Sadie's diaper, she took off running and got away without her pants. I said, "Come back here!" to which she replied, "I'm a pantless wonder!" (Thanks, Aunt Lydia :)

Today at work, I ventured out of the office and helped out on the salesfloor. I was up on a ladder, and I had to stick my head under a hinged-flap cover thing to hold it open while I was grabbing a box from behind it. A customer walked by behind me and said, "Wow. That's really using your head." Ba-dum-bah!

Well, I'm off to do a little voting for you-know-who. I'm such a loser.

Happiness

Every night before I go to bed, I go upstairs to check on my babies. I go in to Josie's room first, and I make sure she's all tucked in and not wedged up against the side of the crib (she likes to push her face up against the corner). She's usually all toasty, and her little cheeks are like squooshy warm velvet to the touch. I love hearing her make her little baby moans, sighs, and little snuffling sounds in her sleep. After I touch her to make sure she's not too hot, I put my hand on her chest to make sure she's breathing. I always whisper, "Night night, sweet baby" and quietly close the door. I tiptoe over to Sadie's room and sneak in. She's usually sprawled out all over her crib, with a leg or an arm through the slats... sometimes she sleeps face down with her little bottom stuck up in the air. I roll her over, smooth her wispy hair back from her face, place my hand on her forehead, and stare at her serene little face. I love looking at her while she's sleeping and quiet... I hold her hand and watch her breathe. Sometimes as I'm standing there, looking at one of them, my heart feels like it will just explode.... I'm not sure how to explain it, but I have this irresistable urge to fall to my knees and pray. Tears well up in my eyes... there's this overwhelmingness about it all... the fact that these are mine. God gave them to me. They came from me. They call me the most revered name in the world: "Mommy." Happiness.

Josie the Joker

This afternoon, after naptime was supposed to be finished, I yelled upstairs: "Sadie, are you awake?" There was a pause, and then a little voice yelled back, "No!" After I stopped laughing, I sat Josie down in her Boppy pillow with a teething biscuit and went upstairs to get Sadie. When we came back down, I saw Josie, but no teething biscuit. Hmm. I looked around her; no biscuit. I looked at her face more closely... and her cheeks were sticking out way too far to be normal. She had smashed the whole thing into her mouth, SIDEWAYS, and was giving me this macabre little 2-toothed grin with teething biscuit drool down the side of her face. Luckily, I was able to get it out before she could try to swallow the thing whole. Every day's an adventure, let me tell you. This evening, we went to see some "baby kit-cats" at Great Uncle Roger's house. Sadie had a grand old time, and only tried to squish one once. Then she went around the entire basement, pointing out everything to her cousin Jessica and asking, "What's that now? What's this now?" She then told her favorite story about feeding the baby cow with Papaw again. I wish my memory were as good as hers. Then she told her favorite story about feeding the baby cow with Papaw again... oh, wait.

The Search

Saturday, Jesse lost his wallet. We spent 3 days frantically searching for it, combing the movie theater where we think it fell out of his pocket, harassing the theater employees, throwing things around, and yelling at each other about where it could be. He got a call today from a post office miles and miles away... they have it. Bizarre. Of course, we've already cancelled all the credit cards, and he had no cash in it, so the best we're hoping for is to get his pictures of Sadie and Josie back in one piece. I'm kind of sorry to see its return... there goes my gift idea for his birthday (which, by the way, is in just a couple of weeks. It's the big 3-0. I would make fun of him, but I am constantly reminded that he is only 5 months and 2 days older than me, and my day is coming).

The Not-Quite-Two Comedian

Sadie was in the tub the other night, and Josie was sitting on my lap, peering over into the water. She accidentally pushed the bottle of baby wash into the tub and it splashed both her and Sadie in the face. After two looks of surprise and shock, they both burst into giggles. Sadie then put the bottle back on the edge of the tub, and Josie went for it again. Splash! More squeals and giggles. Again. Splash! Cheers from Sadie, shrieks of delight from Josie. The game was on. They must have done this thirty times... I can't tell you how neat it was to see them interacting and playing together as sisters for the very first time.

These are just a few of the things that Sadie has said in the past couple of days. She keeps me laughing, even when I'm in a bad mood.

She absolutely loves Juicy Juice juice boxes. You know, the little square boxes with the straws attached? She's only allowed to have one a day, but she's always trying to manipulate us in order to con another one. The other night, she said, with dramatic emphasis, "Need juice box now... need juice box ALL DAY LONG!"

Today, as I was changing the sheets, she took one of the pillows, hugged it to her chest, closed her eyes, and said, "Pillow, pillow... I LOVE pillows."

She also wanted to climb up on the bed, and I told her to wait until I was finished putting the sheets back on. She thought about this for a second, then said, "Finish NOW, Mommy!"

She has taken to adding "now" to the ends of all of her questions... for any of you who have ever seen the "meow" scene in the movie Super Troopers, this should have an especially funny meaning. "What's that now?" "Where that now?" "What's this now?" "What doin,' now?"

And last but not least (this had me rolling in the floor), as I was putting her to bed last night, she took her little black sunglasses with Piglet on the sides, put them on, placed her hands on her hips, gave me a cool stare, and said, "Hey, Man...."

What Now?

Sadie, when she doesn't know what something is called, points at it and says, "What's this now? What's that now? What's this now?"

The Shame, the Shame

Okay, I think I am obsessed. Again, I stayed up to watch "you know what." Again, I called in no less than 23 times to vote for "you know who." Geez oh man. Other things I am ashamed of today: I ate 3 Cadbury eggs. Yes, three. The diet is not going well. I unknowingly stole a 3 pack of RightGuard men's deodorant from Wal-mart because it fell into Josie's carseat and I didn't see it when I checked out. A friend from work waved at me in the parking lot of a restaurant and I pretended I did not see her because I had on zilcho make-up. Instead of doing my daily Bible reading in the bathtub like I usually do, I started the sequel to "The Talisman." I watched "Walk the Line" (FABULOUS movie, I must say) and now I am subconsciously singing "Folsom Prison Blues" all the time. On its own, this is not that bad. With a toddler, however, I am inadvertently teaching her to sing, "I shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die." I am on a slippery slope, and we all know that I have no ability to balance. Or sensible shoes.

Selfish is as Selfish Does

I'm having issues. Not sure what my problem is... if it's hormonal or what, but my patience has been practically non-existent these past few days. Maybe it's because I'm always a little sad after I go home and then come back up here. Anyway, my father-in-law called me a "grumpy broad" yesterday (lol) so I guess I need to shape up.

I didn't work today, but I had lots of work to do! Still preparing for this weekend... I have to get up early tomorrow and decorate a church for a wedding and deliver all of the flowers (thank goodness the bride wanted artificial rather than fresh, otherwise I don't know what I would've done). I finished putting together all of the materials for my workshop on Saturday (I have to be there at the crack of dawn to set up), so now all I have to do is buy enough food for 16 people for breakfast, lunch, and dinner and cook, cook, cook. If you don't hear from me for a while, I have collapsed in a puddle in the kitchen floor. Ding! I'm done!

Today, Sadie whispered to her Grandma Beth, "I'm a whippersnapper." heehee - that's what her Grandpa Roy calls her. It was pretty cute. She also said, "Put this Snoopy up there in his bed and give me the other one, please." That was the longest sentence ever (she has 2 backup Snoopys that live in her closet... she likes to rotate every now and then). Josie is now ticklish under her arms and likes playing the "Up close... Far away" zooming-back and forth- in front- of the mirror game with her daddy. Speaking of him, I am so jealous. Now I know how my mama felt all those years since I've always been a Daddy's girl. Sadie snuggled up next to him, put her arms around his neck and said, "Oh, Daddy, I love you... So much." Awww!!! What am I? Chopped liver?!

I'm far too blessed with these girls (and my husband) to complain, and yet, somehow, I do it anyway. Sometimes I wonder how I ended up being so lucky. I certainly don't deserve them. Or anything else, for that matter. Over the past few days, I've really been dwelling on what a bad person I basically am. Intrinsically evil, you could say. I mean, I'm not a serial killer or anything (maybe a cereal killer - I've been known to polish off a bowl or three of Fruity Pebbles now and then), but I am selfish, selfish, selfish. Trying to train Sadie not to say, "It's mine! MINE!" and "Me, me, me" all the time is definitely teaching me something. Human nature cannot be defeated, no matter how old we get and no matter how mature we may become. Selfishness is definitely inherent... I often find myself saying the same thing in my mind, "Me, me, me!" Thank God for grace and forgiveness.

I'm a Rambling Man... Um, I Mean, Woman

Hello, my devoted readers... I've got to tell you, I'm surprised that so many of you are hooked on my blog. I had no idea that so many of you care about my life! Thanks for all of the emails... I feel like my rambling actually has a receptive audience now (rather than a blank stare from my husband - he's Mr. Logical, and doesn't take well to rambling).

I know I've been posting my little heart out here, but I've been trying to play catch up after my sabbatical trip home. I didn't realize I missed doing this until I started writing yesterday and couldn't stop!

So I just watched my only (the only one I'm admitting, anyway) vice - American Idol. I can't believe I'm still watching it, but now I am totally pulling for Chris Daughtry. I told you a few weeks ago that he's my choice, and man! I am SO sticking with him. Did anyone SEE him tonight? Holy moly. I know, I know, no one cares about this dumb TV show but me. I can't help it.

High for the day: I have now lost 18 pounds! Don't worry... there is still no danger of me floating away in one of these nor'easter winds.

Low for the day: Exhaustion taking over. Overextended... late nights, doing a wedding this weekend (this is one of the bouquets I made) AND coordinating a workshop/seminar AND having company for the weekend. Isn't it bizarre that I still waste 2 hours waiting for Chris Daughtry to sing? Did I mention that he's from NC? ... someone shut me up, please.

Good joke passed on from my sister-in-law Sarah:
A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected a half-gallon of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce, a 2 lb. can of coffee and a 1 lb. package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated,"You must be single." The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well, you know what? You're absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?" The drunk replied, " 'Cause you're ugly."

Thank you, and good night! :)

One is silver and the other gold...

Do you know how it feels when you see an old friend that you haven't seen for a really long time? Kind of like you're coming home, right? That's how it always feels to me. Completing the circle, filling a space that's been empty when you didn't even know it, making old wrongs right, creating new memories on top of the old ones... I like that feeling. I like my old friends. Don't get me wrong - I like my new friends, too, but isn't there a beauty... a fulfillment... an almost freeing grace that comes from being with the ones who know you - really know you? And they love you anyway? I am so blessed to have a few friends like that. If you haven't seen your old friends lately, call them. Hang out. Do something crazy. Talk into the wee hours. I'm telling you - do it! It will make you feel more alive.

No Place Like Home on the Range

Well, we went home over the weekend... home to North Carolina. Let me tell you, there's just something about being in the shelter of those familiar green mountains that makes me feel, well, sheltered. Safe. Protected. At home. My dimishing accent returns with a vengeance.

As soon as I hit the county line, something changes inside of me. Stress levels seem to dissipate, and I feel somehow lighter, more free - I feel sixteen again. The pickup trucks with gun racks on the two lane roads, the armchairs in front yards, the crappy old cars up on blocks, the coon dogs, the livermush and split-fried hotdogs "all the way," the way my Daddy's always fixin' something in the garage, my Grandma's always got a pot of pintos on the stove, and my Mama's always telling me to be careful and lock my doors... it's the essence of home.

The girls had a great time being spoiled by Grammie, Great-Grandma, Papaw, and Mamaw. Not to mention numerous aunts, uncles, and Cindi. :) Sadie got to feed a baby calf at my Daddy's house. She is still SO excited about it. She's telling everyone, "Help Papaw, feed cow, baby, feed with bot-tell!"

Coming back is always the worst part of going. Sadie sits in the back seat, saying, "See Grammie now. See Papaw now. 3 weeks. 3 weeks." (We tell her how long it will be until she sees them again). She now says, "Bye" like "Buy," not like "By" (in other words, the way you're supposed to say it!).

You can take a girl out of the South, but you sure can't take the South out of the girl, ya'll. :)

Queen of Participles

"I standin'."
"I sittin'."
"I climbin'."
"I sweepin'."
"I jumpin'."
"I helpin'."
"I singin'."

- as quoted by Sadie, 23 months old. Also a quote: "I'm a genius." (I taught her that one :)

I Smell A Rat

Some days, it just doesn't pay to get out of bed.

First thing this morning, I tripped on the way to the car and almost flattened my nose against the side of the van. At work, I whacked my elbow on a filing cabinet which brought tears to my eyes. I then proceeded to be hit on by a 50ish lawyer/podiatrist in the Outdoor Lighting aisle who asked me if I'd like to come and (wink, wink) check out his new jacuzzi. Ick.

Once I got home, it was poop, poop, and more poop, followed by a phone call that I'd been waiting on for two days. Of course, when it finally came, the battery in my phone died about 3 seconds after I said hello.

Just when I thought the cosmic conspiracy couldn't get any worse, I decided to do the nice wifely thing and do some laundry for Jesse... yucky, stinky stuff that had been left out in the garage for a week or two, unbeknownst to yours truly. I go down to the laundry room, dump it in the washing machine, and turn it on. I go back down about an hour later to transfer it to the dryer. Well, after I got everything out, I happened to see some fuzz in the bottom of the washer... you know, a lintball or something that had fallen off during the cycle. I reached in to get it out and

PICKED UP A LIMP, SOGGY, DEAD MOUSE IN MY BARE HAND!!!

Arrgh!!! I still shudder to think about it. I screamed, of course, tossed the mouse in the air (luckily I was right next to the trash can, in which the mouse miraculously landed). I can still feel its disgusting little squishy, bony body in my unsuspecting hand! Bile rises in my throat. Blahahahhh. I can't talk about it anymore.

Funny Joke

This guy at work told me this joke today... he said it was really old, but I'd never heard it and I just rolled. There is always some truth in humor.... :) "Marriage is like a three ring circus. First comes the engagement ring. Then comes the wedding ring. Then comes the suffering."

This and That

Well, we are hitting the road to the South on Wednesday night - yippee! The girls and I and our friend Melissa are going home for a visit. Melissa is from Kentucky, but she just wanted to go anywhere south of here! Much like me, I might add. Sadie is so excited... I made the mistake of telling her that we're going about a week ago. I should've waited until the night before we left. Now she asks me all the time, "See Papaw? See Grammy? See Mamaw? See Great Gramma? Rudy? Cameron? Ride bi-cycle?" (Daddy & Sylvia got her a hot wheels for Christmas) It's pretty cute. I am so glad that she remembers everyone; otherwise, I'd probably be boohooing all of the time instead of a great deal of the time :) Josie has a cold, so she isn't having a very good time this week. She's sneezing little sneezes, coughing little coughs, whining little whines, and crying BIG cries. When she isn't happy, she wants everyone to know it. Sadie makes it a point to tell me, "Mommy, Mommy... Josie crying. Josie crying!!!" While I do appreciate her big-sisterly concern, I must admit that I think it's much funnier when she hears Josie and yells, "I comin', Josie-bean! I comin'! Quiet! Okay?" On a scary note, my sister-in-law Sarah informed me about this website that lets you see exactly where registered sex offenders are living in your area (see my "Die, Perverts, Die" Post if you're wondering where this is coming from). In a ten mile radius from here, there are 96. NINETY-SIX. I thought, "Well, maybe this is because we're on the outskirts of Cleveland. Not so... in a ten mile radius of my little ole' town in the South, there are 36. THIRTY-SIX!!! Please visit this site... make yourself and your kids aware of dangers that may be lurking in your own backyard. I don't mean to scare you, but hey! I'm scared, and why should I be the only one?! :) www.familywatchdog.us